“Wine is the first weapon that devils use in attacking the young.”

The charges we bring against others often come home to ourselves; we inveigh against faults which are as much ours as theirs; and so our eloquence ends by telling against ourselves.

Make knowledge of the Scripture your love. Live with them, meditate on them, make them the sole object of your knowledge and inquiries.

The scars of others should teach us caution.

It is no fault of Christianity that a hypocrite falls into sin.

Early impressions are hard to eradicate from the mind. When once wool has been dyed purple, who can restore it to its previous whiteness?

A vice in the heart is an idol on the altar.

Ignorance of the Scriptures is ignorance of Christ.

The Scriptures are shallow enough for a babe to come and drink without fear of drowning and deep enough for theologians to swim in without ever reaching the bottom.

It is worse still to be ignorant of your ignorance.

For the preservation of chastity, an empty and rumbling stomach and fevered lungs are indispensable.

Let your daughter have first of all the book of Psalms for holiness of heart, and be instructed in the Proverbs of Solomon for her godly life.

If there is but little water in the stream, it is the fault, not of the channel, but of the source.

Avoid, as you would the plague, a clergyman who is also a man of business.

Be ever engaged, so that whenever the devil calls he may find you occupied.

Do not let your deeds believe your words, lest when you speak in church someone may say to himself, “Why do you not practice what you preach?

The tired ox treads with a firmer step.

Lately I been drinking like there’s a message in a bottle.

Sometimes I don’t drink so the next day I can remember having fun.

You know that I’m too drunk to talk right now. You put your cigarette out on my face.

Candy is dandy but liqueur is quicker.

Being a functioning alcoholic is kind of like being a paraplegic lap dancer: You can do it, just not as well as the others, really.

Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.

I just drank a fifth of vodka, dare me to drive?

Wine can of their wits the wise beguile, Make the sage frolic, and the serious smile.