Most people don’t care if you’re telling them the truth or if you’re telling them a lie, as long as they’re entertained by it.
TOM WAITSI always liked the idea that America is a big facade. We are all insects crawling across on the shiny hood of a Cadillac. We’re all looking at the wrapping. But we won’t tear the wrapping to see what lies beneath.
More Tom Waits Quotes
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I hate Disneyland. It primes our kids for Las Vegas.
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I’m always looking for sounds that are pleasing at the time. The sound of a helicopter is really annoying until you’re drowning, and it’s there to rescue you. Then it sounds like music.
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I don’t have a drinking problem ‘Cept when I can’t get a drink.
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Well, it’s either kiss me or kill me, that’s how I see it.
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I sold a quart of blood and bought a half a pint of scotch.
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She’s got the whole dark forest living inside of her.
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Don’t you know there ain’t no devil, it’s just god when he’s drunk.
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I put food on the table and roof overhead. But I’d trade it all tomorrow for the highway instead.
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Children make up the best songs, anyway. Better than grown-ups. Kids are always working on songs and throwing them away, like little origami things or paper airplanes. They don’t care if they lose it; they’ll just make another one.
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I like Thelonious Monk, he’s so gnarled, he’s like a piece of machinery that’s pulled up the bolts on the floor and gone off on its own.
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All that you’ve loved is all you own.
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When your down on your luck and you’ve lost all your dreams theres nothing like a campfire and a can of beans.
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You got to tell me the brave captain Why are the wicked so strong? How do the angels get to sleep When the devil leaves the porch light on?
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You can learn a lot about a woman by getting smashed with her.
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The earth is not my home, I’m just passing by.
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Bill Hicks – blowtorch, excavator, truthsayer, and brain specialist. He will correct your vision. Others will drive on the road he built.
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I’ll take a rusty nail and scratch your initials on my arm.
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The dog won’t bite if you beat Him with a bone.
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If I exorcise my devils, all my angels may go, too.
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Writing songs is like capturing birds without killing them. Sometimes you end up with nothing but a mouthful of feathers.
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You can drive out nature with a pitch fork But it always comes roaring back again.
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I like vocal word stuff. But I don’t always write with an instrument, I usually write a capella. It’s more like drawing in the air with your fingers. It’s closest to the choreography of a bee. You’re freer.
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You learn as much from your kids as they learn from you.
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Well you say that it’s gospel, But I know that it’s only church.
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I admit that I ain’t no angel, I admit that I ain’t no saint – I’m selfish and I’m cruel and I’m blind. If I exorcise my devils, well my angels may leave too. When they leave they’re so hard to find.
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On my gravestone, I want it to say, “I told you I was sick.”
TOM WAITS