I cannot for the life of me understand why small children take so long to grow up. I think they do it deliberately, just to annoy me.
ROALD DAHLCandy is dandy but liqueur is quicker.
More Roald Dahl Quotes
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If the Good Lord intended for us to walk, he wouldn’t have invented rollar skates.
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Sex is like nose picking. It’s fine as long as you practice it yourself, but it’s disgusting watching someone else doing it.
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When you’re writing, it’s rather like going on a very long walk.
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The snozberries taste like snozberries!
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Kindness – that simple word. To be kind – it covers everything, to my mind. If you’re kind that’s it.
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I’ve heard tell that what you imagine sometimes comes true.
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The walls were wet and sticky, and peach juice was dripping from the ceiling. James opened his mouth and caught some of it on his tongue. It tasted delicious.
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The more risks you allow your children to make, the better they learn to look after themselves.
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We have so much time and so little to do. Strike that, reverse it.
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Give us strength, oh Lord, to let our children starve.
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We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams.
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Human ‘beans’ is the only animals that is killing their own kind.
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If you are going to get anywhere in life you have to read a lot of books.
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Careful those who fight with monsters, that they might become monsters themeselves.
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The prime function of the children’s book writer is to write a book that is so absorbing, exciting, funny, fast and beautiful that the child will fall in love with it.
ROALD DAHL






