I suffer from two phobias: 1) Phobia-Phobia, the fear that you’re unable to get scared, and 2) Xylophataquieopiaphobia, the fear of not pronouncing words correctly.
We should have a way of telling people they have bad breath without hurting their feelings. Well, I’m bored. Let’s go brush our teeth. Or, I’ve got to make a phone call. Hold this gum in your mouth.
They got special terms that they use when they’re pregnant. They don’t even say pregnant, got special words they use – I’m expecting. Expecting what? I’m expecting a child, silly. Well, then, you probably got a good shot!
You know what offends me? Offended people. In a country with guaranteed rights to freedom of religion, its citizens are constantly trying to make faith in public spheres illegal, I am offended by that contradiction and want to talk about it as a comic.
Oh, I know: If you’re fat, let’s not blame you, let’s sue McDonalds! Oh, for cryin’ out loud, hey, if you smoke, not your fault, it’s the tobacco company’s fault! Hey, if you shoot somebody, not your fault, let’s blame the gun industry!
It’s about something that strikes you as funny but I do it with a Christian world view: why we think the way we do based on God’s plan. I lift up my God and my country and I resist political correctness.
The way to stop political correctness is to not do it. If someone says, You offended me then you say I don’t care! If they’re offended by the truth, that’s their issue!
