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When asked, ‘Shall I tell my mother I’m gay?’, I reply, ‘Never tell your mother anything.

Quentin Crisp

Love is the extra effort we make in our dealings with those whom we do not like and once you understand that, you understand all. This idea that love overtakes you is nonsense. This is but a polite manifestation of sex. To love another you have to undertake some fragment of their destiny.
QUENTIN CRISP

Deal Effort Extra Like Love Make One Out Understand
I never saw Portsmouth by day.
QUENTIN CRISP

Day never Sawm Posts Youth
Women have decided to be people, which is a great mistake. Women were nicer than people.
QUENTIN CRISP

Decide Great Mistake Nicer People Women
An autobiography is an obituary in serial form with the last installment missing.
QUENTIN CRISP

Autograph From Installment Last Miss Obituary Serial
If I were God – and I never understand why I’m not – I should say, “Shop around, I don’t think you’ll find a better bargain than here.”
QUENTIN CRISP

Around Bargain Better Find God Shop Should Think Understand
The young always have the same problem – how to rebel and conform at the same time. They have now solved this by defying their parents and copying one another.
QUENTIN CRISP

Always Conform Problem Rebel Same Time Young
The formula for achieving a successful relationship is simple: you should treat all disasters as if they were trivialities but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster.
QUENTIN CRISP

Achieve Disaster Formula never Relationship Simple Successful Treat Trivialities
I don’t like peas, and I’m glad I don’t like them, because if I liked them I would eat them and I hate them.
QUENTIN CRISP

Eat Glad Hate Like Peas Them
Manners are love in a cool climate.
QUENTIN CRISP

Climate Cool Love Manner
I simply haven’t the nerve to imagine a being, a force, a cause which keeps the planets revolving in their orbits and then suddenly stops in order to give me a bicycle with three speeds.
QUENTIN CRISP

Being Force Have Imagine Keep never Orbit Planet Revolve Simple Stop Sudden
Is not the whole world a vast house of assignation of which the filing system has been lost?
QUENTIN CRISP

Assignation Been Fill House Lost System Vast Whole
Euphemisms are unpleasant truths wearing diplomatic cologne.
QUENTIN CRISP

Cologne Diplomatic Euphemism Truth Unpleasant Wear
Fashion is a way of not having to decide who you are. Style is deciding who you are and being able to perpetuate it.
QUENTIN CRISP

Able Being Decide Fashion Perpetuate Style Way
The measure of woman’s distaste for any part of her life lies not in the loudness of her lamentations (these are only an attempt to buy a martyr’s crown at a reduced price) but in her persistent pursuit of that occupation of which she never ceases to complain.
QUENTIN CRISP

Any Attempt Buy Cease Complain Crown Distaste Kie Lamentation Life Loudness Martyr Measure Occupation Part Persistent Price Pursuit Reduced Woman
People are not heterosexual or homosexual, just sexual.
QUENTIN CRISP

Heterosexual Homosexual Just People Sexual
Well, it has done terrifying things. Religious ideas are inflammatory in a way that I find difficult to understand. There are very few wars over the theory of relativity. Very few heated arguments, for that matter. Whereas, in Northern Ireland, they are killing one another over religion.
QUENTIN CRISP

Difficult Done Find Idea Inflammatory Religious Terrifying Understand Wany

When asked, ‘Shall I tell my mother I’m gay?’, I reply, ‘Never tell your mother anything.

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When asked, ‘Shall I tell my mother I’m gay?’, I reply, ‘Never tell your mother anything.

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