The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop.
P. J. O'ROURKEThe mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop.
P. J. O'ROURKEYou can’t get rid of poverty by giving people money.
P. J. O'ROURKEI look around my house, and everything except the kids and dogs was made in China. And I’m not sure about the kids. They have brown eyes and small noses.
P. J. O'ROURKESupposedly, summer vacation happens because that’s when the kids are home from school, although having the kids home from school is no vacation. And supposedly the kids are home from school because of some vestigial throwback to our agricultural past.
P. J. O'ROURKEIf you ask the government to solve all of your problems, it’s a bit like asking your wife to cook and clean, to raise the children, to hold down a second job to help with the family finances, to keep her parents happy and well and keep your parents happy and well, and to also – to do the lawn and clean the gutters.
P. J. O'ROURKERussians not only vehemently despise blacks, they believe Africa begins at the Ukraine border.
P. J. O'ROURKEYou know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they’re going.
P. J. O'ROURKENew Hampshire polling data are unreliable because, when you call the Granite State’s registered Republicans and independents in the middle of dinner and ask them who they’re going to vote for, they have a mouth full of mashed potatoes and you can’t understand what they say.
P. J. O'ROURKEAdam Smith’s huge failure was the fact that he did not foresee the industrial revolution.
P. J. O'ROURKERich people don’t like to be in the military. The shoes are ugly and the uniforms itch. Rich people don’t go in much for revolution or terrorism, either.
P. J. O'ROURKEEven very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.
P. J. O'ROURKENever be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife.
P. J. O'ROURKEI read good. I was an English major.
P. J. O'ROURKEMaking fun of born-again Christians is like hunting dairy cows with a high powered rifle and scope.
P. J. O'ROURKENo industry in living memory has collapsed faster than daily print journalism.
P. J. O'ROURKEI was very much in favor of the Iraq invasion.
P. J. O'ROURKE