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I don’t even know which end of a computer one is supposed to gaze into. I’ve never used a computer.

P. J. O'Rourke

Fiscal conservatism is just an easy way to express something that is a bit more difficult, which is that the size and scope of government, and really the size and scope of politics in our lives, has grown uncomfortable, unwieldy, intrusive and inefficient.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Bit Difficult Express Fiction Government More Past Size Something
Government proposes, bureaucracy disposes. And the bureaucracy must dispose of government proposals by dumping them on us.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Bureaucracy Dispose Dump Government Propose
Some people think that welfare reform should have hurt Bill Clinton with black voters.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Black People Reformer Some Think Voter
The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Country Government Make Mystery People Stop
Family love is messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive pattern, like bad wallpaper.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Bad Family Love Messy Pattern Wallpaper
Rich people don’t like to be in the military. The shoes are ugly and the uniforms itch. Rich people don’t go in much for revolution or terrorism, either.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Military People Revolution Rich Shoe Terrorism Uniform
The people who despise America are the editors of the ‘New Statesman.’ Their green-card applications must have been turned down.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Association Card Country Desire Down Editor Green People Turn
Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Difficult Discipline Parent Properly Size
All change is bad. But sometimes it has to be done.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Bad Change Done Sometimes
The divorce rate in 1946 was higher than it ever had been and as high as it ever would be until the ’70s. The reason was that prior relationships had not endured the strain of war.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Divorce Prior Rate Reason Relation Seventy Until Veen
If we heard that somebody starved to death in Sweden or Switzerland, we would be shocked.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Country Death Heard Shock Somebody Starved
My dad died when I was young; my mom remarried with more haste than sense to a fellow… he wasn’t evil or anything, but he was worthless.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Anything Dad Die Fellow Haste Marry Mom Sense Young
Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we’re looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn’t test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Alcohol Anyway Fundamental Look Source Tets Trouble
Call a man ‘ignorant,’ and you have license to show the world your vast fund of knowledge and wise him up.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Call Him Ignorant Knowledge Licence Man Show Vast Wise
Richard Nixon was the best thing that ever happened to journalism. I mean this guy was wonderful. Just when you thought he could get no worse, he got worse.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Best Bought Guy Happen Journalism People Person Popular Thing Wonderful
Barack Obama is more irritating than the other nuisances on the Left.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Irritate Let More Nuisance Other President

I don’t even know which end of a computer one is supposed to gaze into. I’ve never used a computer.

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I don’t even know which end of a computer one is supposed to gaze into. I’ve never used a computer.

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