People are not ants or bees. We do not reason or love or live or die collectively.
P. J. O'ROURKEFiscal conservatism is just an easy way to express something that is a bit more difficult, which is that the size and scope of government, and really the size and scope of politics in our lives, has grown uncomfortable, unwieldy, intrusive and inefficient.
More P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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I like making things. I have a wood shop at home. I am a terrible carpenter but I love doing it.
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Richard Nixon was the best thing that ever happened to journalism. I mean this guy was wonderful. Just when you thought he could get no worse, he got worse.
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Will Generation X and the Millennials do a better job running the world than the boomers have? Let’s hope so.
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You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they’re going.
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To mistrust science and deny the validity of scientific method is to resign your job as a human. You’d better go look for work as a plant or wild animal.
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Wealth brings great benefits to the world. Rich people are heros.
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Catchphrases flourish in contemporary American English.
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Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly.
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Rich people don’t like to be in the military. The shoes are ugly and the uniforms itch. Rich people don’t go in much for revolution or terrorism, either.
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Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does it to somebody else. This is the idea behind foreign policy.
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When you’re a war correspondent, the reader is for you because the reader is saying, ‘Gee, I wouldn’t want to be doing that.’ They’re on your side.
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Let’s reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools – and use it on the teachers.
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The most brilliant satire of all time was ‘A Modest Proposal’ by Jonathan Swift. You’ll notice how everything got straightened out in Ireland within days of that coming out.
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Never be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife.
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The importance of local governance may not be obvious to an America accustomed to treating city and state downfalls with doses of federal comeuppance. Sometimes there’s a reason for that – the Civil War. More often, all reasoning seems absent – No Child Left Behind.
P. J. O'ROURKE