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I enjoy making people laugh. The trick is to tell them jokes against yourself. If you praise yourself, your stories aren’t funny.

Michael Caine

I don’t have any regrets because I’m very optimistic, and live each day as though it’s the last.
MICHAEL CAINE

Day Myself Optimistic Regret
I’ve never taken drugs – if you take a drug of your choice, you get some ecstatic feeling.
MICHAEL CAINE

Choice Drugs Happiness Yourself
I’m not in the Lifetime Achievement area yet-I’m still battling it out in the trenches.
MICHAEL CAINE

Achievement Battle Life Myself Time
I usually control the environment I’m in, but my control is very quiet and subtle.
MICHAEL CAINE

Control Environment Myself Quiet Subtle
If you’re a movie actor, you’re on your own – you cannot control the stage. The director controls it.
MICHAEL CAINE

Control Director Movie Power Yourself
The trouble with women? Elbows.
MICHAEL CAINE

Hands Trouble Woman
I enjoy making people laugh. The trick is to tell them jokes against yourself. If you praise yourself, your stories aren’t funny.
MICHAEL CAINE

Enjoyment Funny Laughter People Praise Story Yourself
English is clipped in speech. Texas is exactly the opposite.
MICHAEL CAINE

Language Opposite Speech
A lot of people said, Who do you think you are? I told them I know exactly who I am and I’ll tell you exactly where I’m going.
MICHAEL CAINE

Destination Journey Myself People Thinking
I was so poor for so long that I didn’t use anything. I didn’t drive cars, I didn’t eat very much. So, I figured the world owed me a debt, so I’ve been eating very well and have had a very big car for a long time. But I still haven’t caught up with my youth.
MICHAEL CAINE

Age Car Drive Eat Myself Poor Youth
That to me is what my idea of film acting should be. There shouldn’t be any acting. You should just be watching a real person.
MICHAEL CAINE

Ideas Movie Person Reality Watch Yourself
Acting is not a competition; everything must be done for the good of the film or else everybody loses.
MICHAEL CAINE

Act Competition Goodness Lose Movie
When becoming a character, you have to steal. Steal whatever you see. You can even steal from other actors’ characterizations; but if you do, only steal from the best.
MICHAEL CAINE

Best Character Steal Yourself
My understanding of women goes only as far as the pleasures.
MICHAEL CAINE

Happiness Understand Woman
Be patient.Of course it will come. It took me years to get an Oscar.
MICHAEL CAINE

Myself Patience Reward Time
As an actor, my attitude towards using of film versus digital is, if you have film, filmmakers have to cut eventually so you don’t have to learn all that dialogue. With digital, they can just go on forever and it’s a nightmare. So, I like film – nice short takes.
MICHAEL CAINE

Actor Attitude Digital Forever Learning Movie Myself
When I look in the mirror, I see someone who’s happy with how he looks, because I was never one of the handsome Hollywood people. And I’ve had success as I’ve gotten older, because I’m able to play characters. I no longer get the girl, but I get the part.
MICHAEL CAINE

Character Happiness Mirror Myself People Play
I did everything. I ran my life exactly as I wanted to, all the time. I never listened to anybody. I’m pig-headed.
MICHAEL CAINE

Head Life Listening Myself Time
The best research for playing a drunk is being a British actor for 20 years.
MICHAEL CAINE

Actor Age Play Research Time
There’s quite a lot of bad stuff written about me. My wife even says a lot of bad stuff about me. But she is wonderful.
MICHAEL CAINE

Bad Herself Quite Wonderful Writing
I never regret anything. I always said that when I’m old, I want to be sitting there regretting the things that I did and not the things that I didn’t do; and now I’m old, and I don’t regret anything! I had fun. I had fun, and I’m still having it.
MICHAEL CAINE

Fun Life Myself Old Regard Regret Talk
Books were my window on the world. Growing up at the Elephant and Castle, which was very rough, my paradise was the library.
MICHAEL CAINE

Book Castle Library Myself Window World
I don’t see myself as anything. I just wander around getting on with my life.
MICHAEL CAINE

Life Myself See Sight
I’m looking for me to disappear, and the acting to disappear, and all you see is a real person.
MICHAEL CAINE

Act Disappear Myself Person Reality
A man’s body may grow old, but inside his spirit can still be as young and as restless as ever.
MICHAEL CAINE

Body Growth Man Old Spirit Young
I have never seen it but by all accounts it is terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built and it is terrific.
MICHAEL CAINE

Account Built Myself See Sight Terrible Terrific
Hollywood is a cross between a health farm, a recreation center and an insane asylum. It’s a company town, and I happen to like the company!
MICHAEL CAINE

Character Company Health Myself Nature Recreation

I enjoy making people laugh. The trick is to tell them jokes against yourself. If you praise yourself, your stories aren’t funny.

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I enjoy making people laugh. The trick is to tell them jokes against yourself. If you praise yourself, your stories aren’t funny.

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