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I’m rather secular. I’m basically Jewish. But I think I’m Jewish not because of the Jewish religion at all.

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All short women have a delayed fuse. Marry a taller woman: My wife was an inch or two taller than me; it’s a sign of security.
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Delay Fuse Inch Marry Me Security Short Sign Taller Two Wife Women
Rhetoric does not get you anywhere, because Hitler and Mussolini are just as good at rhetoric. But if you can bring these people down with comedy, they stand no chance.
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Anywhere Chance Comedy Get Good Just People Person Rhetoric Stand You
I’m still a horse that can run. I may not be able to win the Derby, but what do you do when you retire? People retire and they vegetate. They go away and they dry up.
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No, no, the songs write themselves, almost.
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Almost No Son Themselves Write
Look, I don’t want to wax philosophic, but I will say that if you’re alive you’ve got to flap your arms and legs.
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Alive Arm Flap Got Leg Look Philosophic Want Wax
Well, you know, ‘Spaceballs’ is a weird combination, because it’s a simple, sweet little fairytale, and it’s crazy and out-there and making fun of and taking apart sci-fi, ‘Star Wars’, and ‘Star Trek’.
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Combination Crazy Fairytale Know Little Make Out Science Simple Spaceball Sweet Weird Well
The brilliance of Max Brooks is that he always quotes authorities at the back of his books that never existed. Like a Russian professor he made up that validates a story or character.
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Always Authority Back Boo Brilliant Brook Character Country Exist Like Max never Professor Story Quote
There’s an army story in me, and I think there’s a WWII Brooks film somewhere.
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Army Brook Film Me Somewhere Story Think
Immortality is a by-product of good work.
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Good Immortality Product Work
I only direct in self-defense.
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You got to be brave. If you feel something, you’ve really got to risk it.
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Brave Feel Got Reality Risk Something You
Everything starts with writing. And then to support your vision, your ideas, your philosophy, your jokes, whatever, you’ve gotta perform them and/or direct them, or sometimes just produce them.
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Judd Apatow is pretty good, both as a producer and as a director.
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We want to get people laughing; we don’t want to offend anybody.
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Anybody Get Laugh Offenf People Want
Well, just being stupid and politically incorrect doesn’t work. You can be politically incorrect if you’re smart.
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Being Incorrect Just Politically Stupid Well Work
It’s talent. Either you got it or you ain’t.
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Either Got Or Talent You

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