“I will never do another TV series. It couldn’t top I Love Lucy, and I’d be foolish to try. In this business, you have to know when to get off.”

Use a make-up table with everything close at hand and don’t rush; otherwise you’ll look like a patchwork quilt.

One of the things I learned the hard way was that it doesn’t pay to get discouraged. Keeping busy and making optimism a way of life can restore your faith in yourself.

Love yourself first and the rest of your life will fall into place.

In life, all good things come hard, but wisdom is the hardest to come by.

Ability is of little account without opportunity.

It’s a helluva start, being able to recognize what makes you happy.

How I Love Lucy was born? We decided that instead of divorce lawyers profiting from our mistakes, we’d profit from them.

A man who correctly guesses a woman`s age may be smart, but he’s not very bright.

I was shy for several years in my early days in Hollywood until I figured out that no one really gave a damn if I was shy or not, and I got over my shyness.

Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead.

I’m not funny. What I am is brave.

I am a real ham. I love an audience. I work better with an audience. I am dead, in fact, without one.

Now get the hell out of here and go change the world.

I never thought I was funny. I don’t THINK funny.

The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.

Television is the quickest form of recognition in the world.

It is better to be silent, than to dispute with the Ignorant.

I was such a fool to fall for all the lies you told me.

A fool is known by his speech; and a wise man by silence.

One has to be insincere and promise something which you cannot fulfill. So you either have to be a fool who does not understand what you are promising, or deliberately be lying.

Only a fool lets somebody else tell him who his enemy is – never let your enemies choose your enemies for you.

Only fools don’t contradict themselves.

Follow the rules or follow the fools.

I have great faith in fools – self-confidence my friends will call it.