“I know how many people call him a racist and all this, and it just makes me sick because he’s not.”

I’m a kind of go-getter.

I’ve had it with the USGA and the way they run their tournaments. The USGA loves to embarrass guys who play in their tournaments.

My dad being not the greatest dad in the world has made me a better parent.

I wasn’t a silver-spoon kid on the golf course growing up.

It’s not like I’m starting out with $500 a pull or $1,000 a pull. I go in there and play $25, and if I win, I play $100s.

I didn’t want to admit I had problems. I just let ’em build up. I didn’t want anybody to know I was hurtin’.

In life, you have got to make the best of every situation; you have to keep going.

I would walk off a course. I think I lost a little bit of respect, but hopefully I’ve gained that back.

Sometimes it works out. Sometimes it doesn’t.

I’ve had enough of worrying about everybody else. Now I’m taking care of me.

I know there’s a lot of guys would love to see me fail.

I’m really good at math and history, but I suck in English.

I don’t hide anything. There’s just nothing to hide with me.

I’m not scared of Tiger. I’m not scared to go head-to-head. I’m not scared to have a long-drive contest with him.

Florida sends me a handicap sticker when I’m there. It’s embarrassing. But I can’t walk more than six holes before the whole knee swells up, and then I can’t go anymore.

Perception’s not reality.

All satanic works are performed from the outside inward; all divine works from the inside outward.

There is nothing small about our God, and when we understand God we will find out that there ought not to be anything small about us.

God is not external to anyone, but is present with all things, though they are ignorant that He is so.

I love being on stage, I love being able to tell a story, I love the fact that the audience listens and laughs at it. It makes me happy, and it’s what I live for.

I dislike religion quite intensely. It’s been the cause of all the grief in the world ever since they discovered the first stone to worship.

All my dreams came true. There’s not many people that can say that. I mean, most people have to work in a job they hate all their lives, and I can’t imagine that.

Cut away all that is excessive, straighten all that is crooked, bring light to all that is overcast, labour to make all one glow of beauty and never cease chiselling your statue.

By all accounts I should be dead! The abuse I put my body through: the drugs, the alcohol, the lifestyle I’ve lived the last 30 years!