A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.
H. L. MENCKENWhen fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression.
More H. L. Mencken Quotes
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There’s really no point to voting. If it made any difference, it would probably be illegal.
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The American people, North and South, went into the [Civil] war as citizens of their respective states, they came out as subjects … what they thus lost they have never got back.
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The theory seems to be that as long as a man is a failure he is one of God’s children, but that as soon as he succeeds he is taken over by the Devil.
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A sense of humor always withers in the presence of the messianic delusion, like justice and the truth in front of patriotic passion.
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Morality is doing what is right, no matter what you are told. Religion is doing what you are told, no matter what is right.
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The average man does not get pleasure out of an idea because he thinks it is true; he thinks it is true because he gets pleasure out of it.
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Always remember this: If you don’t attend the funerals of your friends, they will certainly not attend yours.
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It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.
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All government, in its essence, is a conspiracy against the superior man: its one permanent object is to oppress him and cripple him.
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The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.
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After all is said and done, a hell lot of a lot more is said than done.
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Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.
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On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart’s desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.
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An idealist is one who, on noticing that roses smell better than a cabbage, concludes that it will also make better soup.
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Laws are no longer made by a rational process of public discussion; they are made by a process of blackmail and intimidation, and they are executed in the same manner
H. L. MENCKEN