We’re told to go on living our lives as usual, because to do otherwise is to let the terrorists win, and really, what would upset the Taliban more than a gay woman wearing a suit in front of a room full of Jews?
ELLEN DEGENERESSo many people prefer to live in drama because it’s comfortable. It’s like someone staying in a bad marriage or relationship – it’s actually easier to stay because they know what to expect every day, versus leaving and not knowing what to expect.
More Ellen DeGeneres Quotes
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Dan: ‘Ah, well, I hope this didn’t have anything to do with me.’ Ellen: ‘No, not unless you played Cat Woman in Batman.
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Penguins mate for life. Which doesn’t really surprise me, because they all look exactly alike. It’s not like they’re gonna meet a better-looking penguin someday.
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So, I bought a new CD and I was trying to get it open but couldn’t with all the layers… I mean plastic and then tape, and the tape is like government tape. It says ‘open here.’ Is that sarcasm?
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I would love for the world to be happier.
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If someone ever says you’re weird, say thank you.
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I learned compassion from being discriminated against. Everything bad that’s ever happened to me has taught me compassion.
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You know me. Any excuse to put on a dress.
ELLEN DEGENERES -
Portia and I have been married for 4 years and they have been the happiest of my life. And in those 4 years, I don’t think we hurt anyone else’s marriage. I asked all of my neighbors and they say they’re fine
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I have a great career, and I have wonderful fans who really are supportive and loyal – because I’m not hiding anything from them.
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My hair is always at its best in New York. I don’t know what’s in the water. It could be mousse.
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I had a really tough time for a few years. My show was gone. My phone wasn’t ringing. There wasn’t one job offer. And at that point, I thought I knew for sure that I wouldn’t work in Hollywood again.
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I never see the glass half empty because I drink out the bottle
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I get to do stand-up every single day. I love that live energy exchange between the audience and myself, and to get to say the things I want to say and comment on.
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My dog of 17 years just died. Oh you’re kidding?… Noooo… as funny as that is, I’m not
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I’m a godmother, that’s a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that’s cute, I taught her that.
ELLEN DEGENERES