We went to lunch and were talking about procrastination and the waitress overheard us and she said, ‘I have a problem with procrastination, too.’ I said ‘Really?… Get my sandwich.’
ELLEN DEGENERESI hate having to do small talk. I’d rather talk about deep subjects. I’d rather talk about meditation, or the world, or the trees or animals, than small, inane, you know, banter.
More Ellen DeGeneres Quotes
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I wanted to have money; I wanted to be special; I wanted people to like me; I wanted to be famous.
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Dan: ‘Ah, well, I hope this didn’t have anything to do with me.’ Ellen: ‘No, not unless you played Cat Woman in Batman.
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…we should be grateful for them because without our family-the ancestors we descend from, the cousins we see once a year, the loves our lives we see every day-life is pretty boring.
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Usually, I wear tennis shoes because my feet are flat, and it hurts to wear anything other than shoes that are cushiony.
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There would be nothing to get me to run for president. I don’t even understand how anyone would want that job at all. Although I would be able to play golf which I don’t seem to have time now.
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So many people prefer to live in drama because it’s comfortable. It’s like someone staying in a bad marriage or relationship – it’s actually easier to stay because they know what to expect every day, versus leaving and not knowing what to expect.
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It’s funny how cucumber water can taste so much better than pickle juice, even though they come from the same source.
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I get bored easily, so I need to do a lot. I’ve started a record label, so I get to nurture new talent and talk about music, which is a passion of mine. I’ve written another book. And I get to come to work and do the TV show, which is always really fun.
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I am saddened by how people treat one another and how we are so shut off from one another and how we judge one another, when the truth is, we are all one connected thing. We are all from the same exact molecules.
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I prefer to believe that people are good and honest and respect me enough to tell me the truth. It’s not easy to find those people all the time, but they’re out there.
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I don’t think I remember my first memory.
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Portia and I have been married for 4 years and they have been the happiest of my life. And in those 4 years, I don’t think we hurt anyone else’s marriage. I asked all of my neighbors and they say they’re fine
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It makes a big difference in your life when you stay positive.
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I get those fleeting, beautiful moments of inner peace and stillness – and then the other 23 hours and 45 minutes of the day, I’m a human trying to make it through in this world.
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I have an amazing team, I have amazing producers, I have amazing writers, but at the end of it, it’s me making the decisions on the writing, the tone, the editing.
ELLEN DEGENERES






