I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. It said, Soup of the Day: Cream of Asparagus. Ellen DeGeneres.
ELLEN DEGENERESStuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it’s worse when you see them wearing dark glasses, having streamers around their necks and a hat on their antlers. Because then you know they were enjoying themselves at a party when they were shot.
More Ellen DeGeneres Quotes
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My name is Ellen and I’m a vegetarian. Just to add another label to me: I am a lesbian, aquarian and vegetarian. I’ve said it.
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A circus! 100 clowns of injustice have climbed out of the tiny clown car of this court room.
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Be kind to one another. Bye, bye.
ELLEN DEGENERES -
It is a fundamental right for people to be allowed to love who they want to love and marry who they want to marry and stop holding on to some form of discrimination that it’s just isn’t fair.
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I know that experts say you’re more likely to get hurt crossing the street than you are flying, but that doesn’t make me any less frightened of flying. If anything, it makes me more afraid of crossing the street.
ELLEN DEGENERES -
When I decided to have my character on the show come out, I knew I was going to have to come out, too. I never wanted to be the lesbian actress. I never wanted to be the spokesperson for the gay community. Ever. I did it for my own truth.
ELLEN DEGENERES -
Most people don’t get to laugh, be free, dance, be surrounded by this energy. It’s important to remind people to take that home. I want the world to start shifting [to] a more positive energy.
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I became vegan because I saw footage of what really goes on in the slaughterhouses and on the dairy farms.
ELLEN DEGENERES -
I’m so unfamiliar with the gym, I call it James!
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My hair is always at its best in New York. I don’t know what’s in the water. It could be mousse.
ELLEN DEGENERES -
You know me. Any excuse to put on a dress.
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So many people prefer to live in drama because it’s comfortable. It’s like someone staying in a bad marriage or relationship – it’s actually easier to stay because they know what to expect every day, versus leaving and not knowing what to expect.
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If you want to get rid of stuff, you can always do a good spring-cleaning. Or you can do what I do. Move.
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I had everything I’d hoped for, but I wasn’t being myself. So I decided to be honest about who I was. It was strange: The people who loved me for being funny suddenly didn’t like me for being… me.
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You know, it’s hard work to write a book. I can’t tell you how many times I really get going on an idea, then my quill breaks. Or I spill ink all over my writing tunic.
ELLEN DEGENERES