Every now and then you’ll say something that didn’t quite work. But the important thing is, as a comic, you try to learn why it didn’t. And then you adjust and figure out how to either make it work or just abandon it because it’s just not funny.
BRAD WILLIAMSI hate that when people are like, “Well, all dwarves know each other, right?” And you want to get mad, but you can’t because we do.
More Brad Williams Quotes
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There are plenty of wonderful, good fat people in the USA that have no problems being fat, who I have no problems with being fat.
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That is the most confusing and insane thing to me, when people get offended on behalf of another group.
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People ask me a lot like, “Hey, so when are you done with your tour?” Like when I die. That’s when I’m done with my tour.
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Yeah, people do need to realize that just because they’ve seen me perform for an hour does not mean that we are now close.
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If you got a hit every third time that you went up to bat in the major leagues, you’d be the greatest hitter of all time. I think my average is a little better than that.
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I was a disabled child. So, people made fun of me, don’t pretend like this never happens. But at the same time, I never cried about it. I never got sad about it.
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I found out if you’re a funny guy, a lot of people like you.
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When a soldier of the night’s watch dies they say, “And now his watch is over.” That’s what they say when a comedian dies. They go, “And now his tour is done.”
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It’s very confusing to me why people take comedians so seriously.
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I try not to be hateful.
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Comedian makes the statement that just isn’t true.
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I admire ventriloquists, because I can’t do that. I mean, I might get mistaken for a ventriloquist dummy every now and then, but I can’t do what they do.
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It’s weird when people ask me, “Why are you so nice?” It’s like, “Because that’s just what you should do. You should be kind to people.” It seems really basic, but it’s amazing how many people forget that.
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I don’t know, why am I called the opposite of what I am? It’s very confusing to me.
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I don’t get to the global issues or anything like that. I am just trying to be silly.
BRAD WILLIAMS