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If you got a hit every third time that you went up to bat in the major leagues, you’d be the greatest hitter of all time. I think my average is a little better than that.

Brad Williams

I’m in awe of comics that do things that I can’t do, or haven’t tried doing yet.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Awe Comic Havens Things
I don’t get to the global issues or anything like that. I am just trying to be silly.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Issues Silly Trying
That is the most confusing and insane thing to me, when people get offended on behalf of another group.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Confusing Insane People
If I make a joke about black people or Asian people or whatever, and then an Asian comes up to me afterwards and says, “That joke offended me,” I’m still more or less not going to listen, but at least it makes sense, like I said something that was about them.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Asian Black People
I don’t know, why am I called the opposite of what I am? It’s very confusing to me.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Confusing Knows Opposites
When a soldier of the night’s watch dies they say, “And now his watch is over.” That’s what they say when a comedian dies. They go, “And now his tour is done.”
BRAD WILLIAMS

Comedian Night Soldier
I’m not going to talk too much politics because I’m not smart enough to do that.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Enough Much Smart Too
Every now and then you’ll say something that didn’t quite work. But the important thing is, as a comic, you try to learn why it didn’t. And then you adjust and figure out how to either make it work or just abandon it because it’s just not funny.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Important Now Then Trying
I hate that when people are like, “Well, all dwarves know each other, right?” And you want to get mad, but you can’t because we do.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Dwarves Hate People
Comedian makes the statement that just isn’t true.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Comedian Statements True
I admire ventriloquists, because I can’t do that. I mean, I might get mistaken for a ventriloquist dummy every now and then, but I can’t do what they do.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Mean might Now Then
If I do talk politics it’s very surface, it’s not in-depth.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Depth Politics Surface
I found out if you’re a funny guy, a lot of people like you.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Guy Like People
There are plenty of wonderful, good fat people in the USA that have no problems being fat, who I have no problems with being fat.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Country People Problem
I don’t know why you’d go to a comedian and say, “You know what? You have a large menu of items, but this one thing I did not like and therefore, you should be shut down. You should cease to make a living and you should be thrown out in the streets.”
BRAD WILLIAMS

Comedian Menus
In every other aspect of their life, we have entertainment that is crafted almost to an individual. So they expect that from stand-up as well.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Aspect Entertainment Individual

If you got a hit every third time that you went up to bat in the major leagues, you’d be the greatest hitter of all time. I think my average is a little better than that.

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If you got a hit every third time that you went up to bat in the major leagues, you’d be the greatest hitter of all time. I think my average is a little better than that.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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