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The next Tory leader would have to unify his party and ensure that Britain stood tall in the world.

Boris Johnson

My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it.
BORIS JOHNSON

Birthday Cake Dessert
I have come to the conclusion that Tony Blair has finally gone mad … he made assertions that are so jaw-droppingly and breathtakingly at variance with reality that he surely needs professional psychiatric help.
BORIS JOHNSON

Mad Needs Reality
My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.
BORIS JOHNSON

Mars Olive Pms Trees
Nothing excites compassion, in friend and foe alike, as much as the sight of you ker-splonked on the Tarmac with your propeller buried six feet under.
BORIS JOHNSON

Compassion Feet Sight
My friends, as I have discovered myself, there are no disasters, only opportunities. And, indeed, opportunities for fresh disasters.
BORIS JOHNSON

Disaster Discover Friendship Myself Opportunity
What makes the achievements of communist Russia so special and different, that you can simper around in a CCCP T-shirt, while anyone demented enough to wear anything commemorating the Third Reich would be speedily banged away under the 1986 Public Order Act?
BORIS JOHNSON

Achievement Commemorating Country Demented Wear
There is absolutely no one, apart from yourself, who can prevent you, in the middle of the night, from sneaking down to tidy up the edges of that hunk of cheese at the back of the fridge.
BORIS JOHNSON

Edge Night Prevent Sneak Yourself
I love swimming in rivers, and well remember once jumping in at Chiswick.
BORIS JOHNSON

Jump Love Swimming
I think it’s absolutely amazing and how the Remain side have the cheek to come and tell us that we improve our security by staying in this organisation I do not understand.
BORIS JOHNSON

Organisation Sides Thinking
I am supporting David Cameron purely out of cynical self-interest.
BORIS JOHNSON

Cynical Interest Self
I lead a life of blameless domesticity and always have done.
BORIS JOHNSON

Blameless Domesticity Done
We celebrate the contribution of people who have come to this country to make it better.
BORIS JOHNSON

Celebrate Country People
I lead a life of blameless domesticity and always have done.
BORIS JOHNSON

Blame Leadership Life Myself
It is just flipping unbelievable. He is a mixture of Harry Houdini and a greased piglet. He is barely human in his elusiveness. Nailing Blair is like trying to pin jelly to a wall.
BORIS JOHNSON

Appearance Believe Flip Human Wall
My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.
BORIS JOHNSON

Chance Myself Opportunity
People are woefully underestimating this country and what it can achieve.
BORIS JOHNSON

Achievement Country People

The next Tory leader would have to unify his party and ensure that Britain stood tall in the world.

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The next Tory leader would have to unify his party and ensure that Britain stood tall in the world.

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