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My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.

Boris Johnson

Bring Harry home to Britain-and if you want a site with less rainfall than Rome, with excellent public transport, and strong connections to Harry Potter, I have just the place.
BORIS JOHNSON

Place Public Strong Transport
It is just flipping unbelievable. He is a mixture of Harry Houdini and a greased piglet. He is barely human in his elusiveness. Nailing Blair is like trying to pin jelly to a wall.
BORIS JOHNSON

Appearance Believe Flip Human Wall
I’m afraid Sadiq Khan is completely wrong. The European Court of Justice is the supreme legal authority in our country.
BORIS JOHNSON

Authority Country Justice
But if people want to swim in the Thames, if they want to take their lives into their own hands, then they should be able to do so with all the freedom and exhilaration of our woad-painted ancestors.
BORIS JOHNSON

Ancestor Freedom Hands Ourselves People
Churchill knew instinctively what was wrong with communism – that it repressed liberty; that it replaced individual discretion with state control; that it entailed the curtailment of democracy, and therefore that it was tyrannous.
BORIS JOHNSON

Communism Democracy Replacement Tyranny Wrong
He is like some sherry-crazed old dowager who has lost the family silver at roulette, and who now decides to double up by betting the house as well.
BORIS JOHNSON

Business Debt House
Since January 1993 there have been 27 other countries not in the EU that have done better than the UK at exporting goods into the single market.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Done January
I dont see why people are so snooty about Channel Five. It has some respectable documentaries about the Second World War. It also devotes considerable airtime to investigations into lap-dancing, and other related and vital subjects
BORIS JOHNSON

Dance Documentary People Respect War World
I have not been more robust towards female rather than male assembly members and I do not believe I have been remotely sexist.
BORIS JOHNSON

Believe Female Males
David Lloyd George had been to Germany, and been so dazzled by the Führer that he compared him to George Washington. Hitler was a ‘born leader’, declared the befuddled former British Prime Minister.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Hero War
He wished that Britain had ‘a man of his supreme quality at the head of affairs in our country today’. This from the hero of the First World War! The man who had led Britain to victory over the Kaiser!
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Raised Today Victory
London is the sporting capital of the world. I say to the Chinese and I say to the world, ping pong is coming home.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Home Ping Pong
They say he is shortly off to the Congo. No doubt the AK47s will fall silent, and the pangas will stop their hacking of human flesh, and the tribal warriors will all break out in Watermelon smiles to see the big white chief touch down in his big white British taxpayer-funded bird.
BORIS JOHNSON

Break Country Out Pangas Shortly Warriors
All the people I talk to, increasingly, can see that the emperor has got no clothes. The case for leaving [the EU] is now overwhelming.
BORIS JOHNSON

Clothes Leaving People
Our friends in America will be at the front of the queue for trade deals.
BORIS JOHNSON

Deal Friendship Queue Trade
Never in my life did I think I would be congratulated by Mick Jagger for achieving anything.
BORIS JOHNSON

Achieve Congratulations Thinking

My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.

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My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.

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