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I am supporting David Cameron purely out of cynical self-interest.

Boris Johnson

My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.
BORIS JOHNSON

Mars Olive Pms Trees
Can I say anything good about Ken Livingstone? A long time ago he did some good things, but I can’t now remember what any of them were.
BORIS JOHNSON

Anything Long Remember Say
My ideal world is, we’re there, we’re in the EU, trying to make it better.
BORIS JOHNSON

Ideals Trying World
If we judged everybody by the stupid, unguarded things they blurt out to their nearest and dearest, then we wouldn’t ever get anywhere.
BORIS JOHNSON

Guard Judgment Stupidity
London is the sporting capital of the world. I say to the Chinese and I say to the world, ping pong is coming home.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Home Ping Pong
The Lib Dems are not just empty. They are a void within a vacuum surrounded by a vast inanition.
BORIS JOHNSON

Empty Surround Vast
Nothing excites compassion, in friend and foe alike, as much as the sight of you ker-splonked on the Tarmac with your propeller buried six feet under.
BORIS JOHNSON

Compassion Feet Sight
My speaking style was criticised by no less an authority than Arnold Schwarzenegger. It was a low moment, my friends, to have my rhetorical skills denounced by a monosyllabic Austrian cyborg.
BORIS JOHNSON

Criticism Low Moments Skills Style Talk
I want you to know that I have nothing against Orlando, though you are, of course, far more likely to get shot or robbed there than in London.
BORIS JOHNSON

London Orlando Want
We celebrate the contribution of people who have come to this country to make it better.
BORIS JOHNSON

Celebrate Country People
The meat in the sausage has got to be Conservative.
BORIS JOHNSON

Conservative Meat Sausage
You know, sometimes I don’t understand what’s wrong with us. This is just about the most creative and imaginative country on earth—and yet sometimes we just don’t seem to have the gumption to exploit our intellectual property.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Hands Jet/ Engines
The mayors fund for London will be a streamlined vehicle for getting money from the wealth creating sector to communities across London that are facing hardship and deprivation and are the victims of crime.
BORIS JOHNSON

Community Creating Hardship
I love tennis with a passion. I challenged Boris Becker to a match once and he said he was up for it but he never called back. I bet I could make him run around.
BORIS JOHNSON

Him Love Myself Passion Run
Nothing excites compassion, in friend and foe alike, as much as the sight of you ker-splonked on the Tarmac with your propeller buried six feet under.
BORIS JOHNSON

Compassion Excitement Sight
I lead a life of blameless domesticity and always have done.
BORIS JOHNSON

Blameless Domesticity Done

I am supporting David Cameron purely out of cynical self-interest.

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I am supporting David Cameron purely out of cynical self-interest.

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