“I make fun of situations and try and find the humor in things, but it’s never at the expense of the other guy.”

Where would I be without baseball? Who am I without baseball?

Before broadcasting for 50-some years, I did TV, played 10 years in the big leagues, won a world championship – and played a big part in that, too, letting the Cardinals inject me with hepatitis. Takes a big man to do that.

Sure, women sportswriters look when they’re in the clubhouse. Read their stories. How else do you explain a capital letter in the middle of a word?

I spent three of the best years of my life in 10th grade.

I had chances to do that stuff, but I like baseball, I really do.

I had been playing for a while, and I asked Louisville Slugger to send me a dozen flame treated bats. But when I got it, I realized they had sent me a box of ashes.

I just grew the hair on my back. Facial hair just wasn’t appealing to me. I liked it on my back, though.

I think my top salary was maybe in 1966. I made $17,000 and 11 of that came from selling other players’ equipment.

Let’s face it. Umpiring is not an easy or happy way to make a living. In the abuse they suffer, and the pay they get for it, you see an imbalance that can only be explained by their need to stay close to a game they can’t resist.

I had a great shoe contract and glove contract with a company who paid me a lot of money never to be seen using their stuff.

Not bragging by any means, but I could have done a lot of other stuff as far as working in films go and working in television…

I set records that will never be equaled. In fact, I hope 90% of them don’t even get printed.

On TV the people can see it. On radio you’ve got to create it.

Career highlights? I had two – I got an intentional walk from Sandy Koufax and I got out of a rundown against the Mets.

Any teammate of mine that had a kid and a boy that was capable of playing baseball.

I did stand-up, weird and ignorant stuff about my career – anything for a laugh.

You must find the things that you do like. The things that are acceptable to your mind.

I didn’t have a list of things I should do this year, next year, find a good novel, sign two stars and make a deal – because I think cinema should come from cinema.

When I found those things, I felt liberated. I found resilience of spirit, realized I had much to offer and gained abundance.

So far, it’s an interesting ride, and I’m curious to see what I can find next.

But what Mom never told me is that along the way, you find sisters, and they find you. Girls are cool that way.

If you look around to find meaning in everything that happens you will end up disappointed.

I think when you find depression and sadness and hopelessness, Many times it’s connected to certain food and access to quality and nutrition.

The first thing that a person finds in life and the last to which he holds out his hand.