The only time I get sick of making people laugh is when I’m in a non-writing-joke mode, and I just can’t seem to come up with anything new that’s funny. That’s a tough place to be as a comedian.
BILL BURRI wasn’t the good looking guy, I wasn’t the hot chick, I wasn’t the fat guy, I didn’t have a catchphrase, I didn’t wear a silly hat. I was just trying to improve as a comedian.
More Bill Burr Quotes
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Do you know how many times a week people ask me why I’m yelling?
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I think it’s a privilege to be able to fly to somewhere where people want to see my show.
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I’m one of those guys where you know, I’m 23 years into this and I love the road more than ever and rather than whittling down my schedule to just play the major cities.
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A lot of my fears and anxieties are the fears and anxieties of a six-year-old boy. When I finally confront them, they’re really small.
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I’m not easy to live with. My wife is a saint.
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You have to understand how bad I wanted to be a comedian, how much I loved doing it. I still can’t believe I get to do this for a living and have people come up and want to see me.
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It was right after 9/11 and I decided to walk around the grounds of the Pentagon, because I had never been there.
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My neighbor’s not even listening to me. He’s all excited about some garden hose he bought at Brookstone. He’s convinced it was designed by NASA. “Actually, it’s got two nozzles, one for the hot and one for the…”
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I wasn’t the good looking guy, I wasn’t the hot chick, I wasn’t the fat guy, I didn’t have a catchphrase, I didn’t wear a silly hat. I was just trying to improve as a comedian.
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Any other town you go to there’s this little devil and a little angel on your shoulder.
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Business runs hot and cold so the more you’re in charge of your own destiny, the better off you are.
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I just do my act. If people in England don’t get my joke I make fun of myself for telling it.
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I was a feature one time and they gave me host money. When I called to complain the guy goes “no you didn’t feature, you co-hosted”. He literally invented a term so he didn’t have to pay me. And obviously that check bounced!
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It’s just if one person says anything it becomes click bait and then they start talking about the comedy climate which is hilarious, so no.
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It’s better to just plough ahead. And if I say something they don’t get, I just make fun of myself for assuming that everybody knows everything about where I live.
BILL BURR