Everyone should just drive out to the Mojave Desert and just experience it, and it’s a fun place to live.
BILL BURRLondon was like that too. It was that time of year when all the rich kids with the oil money have their cars shipped over.
More Bill Burr Quotes
-
-
There is a very difficult period in a comedian’s career – it’s that window of time where you’re good enough to draw tickets but nobody knows you yet.
BILL BURR -
I’ve actually expanded the amount of places that I go to because I want to see a bunch of stuff. You know, plan it as I can while I’m still young enough to travel.
BILL BURR -
I’m like that loud guy in the bar, who kind of makes sense for about ten minutes, and then you realise he flunked everything at high school so you just laugh at him.
BILL BURR -
There is no reason to hit a woman. And I was just like, really? I could give you, like, 17 right off the top of my head.
BILL BURR -
I am so pro-swine flu it’s – it’s like ridiculous.
BILL BURR -
My favorite kind of humor is basically, if it was happening to you, it wouldn’t be funny, but to observe it, it’s hilarious.
BILL BURR -
You’ll be laying there fantasizing about sleeping on a futon. There’s no risk when you go after a dream. There’s a tremendous amount to risk to playing it safe.
BILL BURR -
Carnegie Hall is as good as they say it is. It’s not like Stonehenge which looks great in books but then you go there and it’s a pile of rocks next to a highway. There’s actually a highway right next to it, but you don’t see that in pictures.
BILL BURR -
I used to always work in, like, warehouses, because if my boss gave me a rough time, I could just get on a forklift and just, like, drive away from him.
BILL BURR -
I love doing radio, and I love doing stand-up, obviously.
BILL BURR -
I don’t mind either one [crowd that is more willing to interact or crowd that’s more ready to just watch]. Both of them are forms of listening to what I’m saying so I can’t ask for any more than that.
BILL BURR -
I wasn’t the good looking guy, I wasn’t the hot chick, I wasn’t the fat guy, I didn’t have a catchphrase, I didn’t wear a silly hat. I was just trying to improve as a comedian.
BILL BURR -
I mean, stand up you’re by yourself and it’s live and when you’re acting, unless you’re doing a monologue, you’re interacting with somebody else. Even if you’re doing a monologue you’re saying it to somebody and it’s not live so you can do it a few times.
BILL BURR -
I’m not easy to live with. My wife is a saint.
BILL BURR -
Business runs hot and cold so the more you’re in charge of your own destiny, the better off you are.
BILL BURR