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I’m working my way toward divinity.

Bette Midler

Previously, the jokes were more related to current issues, political. Today people make about each other either funny or about people like Kim Kardashian. It’s brutal. Everything is so much vielschmutziger.
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Brutal People Previously Today
The only thing Madonna will ever do like a virgin is give birth in a stable.
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Birth Giving Virgins
My parents taught me: Do not rely on a man. Not rely on it that you get married and it pays for you. That’s what I figured. I have always paid my own bills.
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Men Parent Pay
I’m looking for something that gives me a chance to stretch. Because I have my own work, and I can do anything I want in my own work – juggle, tap dance, anything I want.
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Anything Stretch Work
I made a lot of people laugh, made a lot of people cry in a good way, brought a lot of joy to people, picked up a lot of garbage. And in all those years, I saw a lot. I went to foreign lands. I met interesting people. And I got it!
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Garbage Good Lot People Saw Way
[On Princess Anne:] Such an active, outdoorsy lass. She loves nature in spite of what it did to her.
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Princess Royalty Spite
I wish America would spend even half as much time complaining about plastics in our oceans as we do about actresses’ plastic surgery.
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Country Ocean Wish
I celebrate everyone’s religious holidays. if it’s good enough for the righteous, it’s good enough for the self-righteous, I always say.
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Holiday Religious Self
The outside world doesn’t have a lot to offer. You have to make your own heaven in your own home.
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Heaven Home World
Enough about me. What do you think about me?
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About Enough Thinking
Life is like cooking your masterpiece recipe. You have to get the right ingredients,have the right mixture and the right cooking time to reveal the PERFECT and DELICIOUS TASTE of your craft.
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Cooking Life Perfect
A lot of people started drinking martinis and smoking cigarettes because they felt it was cool.
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Cigarettes Cool Smoking
People have an obligation to live up to their potential.
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Obligation People Potential
While I was growing up, I believed I could do anything I could think of. So the challenge was always to keep thinking – to get to where I wanted to be and then to think of somewhere else to go.
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Else Growing Somewhere Thinking
I decided years ago not to read stories about myself anymore. Each one is a potential minefield: Whatever it says, you’re bound to take it the wrong way. Why do it if you know it’s going to make you miserable?
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Stories Way Years
Writing a book is not as tough as it is to haul thirty-five people around the country and sweat like a horse five nights a week.
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Book Country Horse

I’m working my way toward divinity.

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I’m working my way toward divinity.

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