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I tried to charm the pants off Bob Dylan, but everyone will be disappointed to learn that I was unsuccessful. I got close – a couple of fast feels in the front seat of a Cadillac.

Bette Midler

I try not to drink too much because when I’m drunk, I bite.
BETTE MIDLER

Drinking Drunk Perspective
Total contentment is only for cows.
BETTE MIDLER

Contentment Cows Total
Do you want to live and work in a garbage dump? I don’t. That’s partly because I grew up in the most pristine environment possible – Hawaii, where it is sacrilege to leave your garbage on the ground.
BETTE MIDLER

Dump Garbage Possible Wanted
[On Helen Reddy:] She ought to be arrested for loitering in front of an orchestra.
BETTE MIDLER

Helen Orchestra Singing
I hope to keep entertaining in some way until I can’t physically entertain any longer. It’s what I was born to do, and I love this profession.
BETTE MIDLER

Born Entertaining Way
Men’s brains are smaller than those of women so they can fit into their penises.
BETTE MIDLER

Brain Fit Men
Some say love it is a river that drowns the tender reeds. Some say love, it is a razor that leaves your heart to bleed. Some say love, it is a hunger, an endless aching need. I say love, it is a flower and you, its only seed.
BETTE MIDLER

Flower Heart River
When I started in this [music] business, I had a dream, but it was amorphous, and I had no experience. I just had a fuzzy notion of what life would be like if I became what I pictured.
BETTE MIDLER

Dream Fuzzy
I celebrate everyone’s religious holidays. if it’s good enough for the righteous, it’s good enough for the self-righteous, I always say.
BETTE MIDLER

Holiday Religious Self
Music is probably the only place I get energy from. Music and maybe watching a really tremendous performer, watching a terrific performer like Jagger or watching a great movie.
BETTE MIDLER

Energy Music Performers
When it’s time to shuffle off this mortal coil, you leave your ashes to be composted.
BETTE MIDLER

Ashes Mortals Shuffle
If someone were to say seriously, “I’m divine,” she’d have to be locked up. There are lots of people in mental institutions going around saying “I’m God.” But because I’m funny about it, they haven’t locked me up yet. And I don’t give myself airs, either.
BETTE MIDLER

Air Giving People
Even if the whole human race dies off because we keep fighting and killing each other and being heartless, the planet will take care of itself. Eventually, after millions of years.
BETTE MIDLER

Fighting Race Years
A lot of people say that my life is wasted on me because I could be a bigger asshole than I am, but I’ve chosen not to be.
BETTE MIDLER

Bigger Life People
I had no idea of being a star, all I knew was that I wanted to be a great actress, I wanted to work as an actress. So I thought the way I would be a great actress was to sing and dance first.
BETTE MIDLER

Doors Ideas Stars
Me, I’m just a hack. I’m just a schlep-per. I just do what I can do.
BETTE MIDLER

Hack Just

I tried to charm the pants off Bob Dylan, but everyone will be disappointed to learn that I was unsuccessful. I got close – a couple of fast feels in the front seat of a Cadillac.

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Popular Authors

I tried to charm the pants off Bob Dylan, but everyone will be disappointed to learn that I was unsuccessful. I got close – a couple of fast feels in the front seat of a Cadillac.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bette Midler Quotes