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The two sides of Bernie – that’s a quiet weapon that I have.

Bernie Mac

I’m not ashamed to tell the truth about what happened in my family. I think that’s what makes my comedy different.
BERNIE MAC

Comedy Different Happen Thinking
Jerry Weintraub, the producer, might be a pain in the ass, but he really knows how to treat his actors.
BERNIE MAC

Actors might Pain Producer
I’m very much disciplined because I’m more mature. When I was young I just wanted to live, I could jump, I could run, I was quick and I was relentless.
BERNIE MAC

Mature Relentless Running
It was rough being dark. I got heat from my own people more than anyone else. I remember going to my mom and saying, ‘Why am I so black?’ And she said, ‘Because I’m black. You just gotta always work harder than the average bear.’
BERNIE MAC

Dark Hard Heart Mom Rough Work
I think a lot of TV insults the audience.
BERNIE MAC

Insult Television Thinking
If I can tell someone a story that makes them bend over and laugh, that’s bigger than anything else.
BERNIE MAC

Bigger Laughing Stories
Suffering is a good teacher. It keeps you in its grip until you’ve learned your lesson.
BERNIE MAC

Lesson Suffering Teacher
My humor had changed from foolishness to making sense.
BERNIE MAC

Changed Foolishness Make Sense
The success of my comedy has been not being afraid to touch on subject matters or issues that everyone else is politically scared of.
BERNIE MAC

Comedy Issue Matter Politically
I have Glocks, .45s, Berettas, Remingtons. I like the marksmanship and the discipline that it takes to be a gun owner. I like the machinery. Being able to take it out and clean it is even more fascinating than having the gun.
BERNIE MAC

Able Discipline Gun Machine Onwer
I always wanted to scuba dive. I used to scuba dive undercover like black Aquaman.
BERNIE MAC

Black Country Scuba Used
I get facials. I get a manicure and pedicure every week. I get my hair cut, and I oil myself down from head to toe. I got that from my brother. I was so impressed with how high maintenance he was. When he left the room, you could still smell him for an hour.
BERNIE MAC

Brother Cutting Hair Head Maintenance Myself
Only way you can you get upset is when you expecting something.
BERNIE MAC

Expecting Something Upset Way
I’m so black, I leave fingerprints on coal.
BERNIE MAC

Black Coal Fingerprints
America…Do not touch my TV, my DVD, my stereo, my dual-deck VCR. Do not touch my old school, my new school, my slow jams, my party jams, my happy rap, and you better not touch…My James Brown.
BERNIE MAC

Country Party Rap School Touch
You can’t be a doctor if you don’t know the entire parts of the body.
BERNIE MAC

Body Doctors Knows

The two sides of Bernie – that’s a quiet weapon that I have.

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The two sides of Bernie – that’s a quiet weapon that I have.

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