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My family are police officers, detectives. My brother Mitch is FBI. Mitch is like that – a stern enforcer.

Bernie Mac

I get facials. I get a manicure and pedicure every week. I get my hair cut, and I oil myself down from head to toe. I got that from my brother. I was so impressed with how high maintenance he was. When he left the room, you could still smell him for an hour.
BERNIE MAC

Brother Cutting Hair Head Maintenance Myself
I’m an entertainer and I really enjoy entertaining. I think if you’re going to really be what you say you are, you have to really live it, work it, practice it, and think it.
BERNIE MAC

Enjoy Entertaining Practice Thinking
Making people laugh is what I’ve been doing since I was like four or five years old. I still have a lust, I still have a passion. I don’t care about how I look, I’m dedicated to the laughs.
BERNIE MAC

Laughing Life Live Making Passion Years
Hugs aren’t like pieces of pie. Plenty of hugs to go around.
BERNIE MAC

Hug Pie Pieces Plenty
As I got older, I got into all kinds of things in the streets – but for some reason, I never got caught up with the gangs growing up. Everybody dug me, man. I never had problems.
BERNIE MAC

Gang Growing Kind Men Up
It took me a long time to get to where I’m at, in my career and as a man. I was going through my trials and tribulations in life, and it gave me the strength to tackle things that have come my way.
BERNIE MAC

Careers Long Men Trial Tribulation
I’ve never been no superficial cat.
BERNIE MAC

Been Cat No Superficial
I love who I am. I love what I’ve become.
BERNIE MAC

Become Create Love
Stand-up is what I am; stand-up is what made me.
BERNIE MAC

Made Stand
I want to speak directly to the audience, to say, ‘I’m like you – I’m frustrated, I’m not an expert, I don’t have a manual on parenting, I make mistakes, I’m selfish too.’
BERNIE MAC

Directly Frustrated Manual Mistake Selfish
I don’t need to pat myself on the back until my arm breaks. I don’t need any of that.
BERNIE MAC

Arms Break Needs
You can’t be a doctor if you don’t know the entire parts of the body.
BERNIE MAC

Body Doctors Knows
I have Glocks, .45s, Berettas, Remingtons. I like the marksmanship and the discipline that it takes to be a gun owner. I like the machinery. Being able to take it out and clean it is even more fascinating than having the gun.
BERNIE MAC

Able Discipline Gun Machine Onwer
They say if you don’t have your health you ain’t got nothing, but the truth is you ain’t got nothing if you don’t have no one to worry about your health.
BERNIE MAC

Health Nothing Truth Worry
Black audiences are hard. They always think they’re better than you. So you got to come with a little extra to satisfy them.
BERNIE MAC

Black Littles Satisfy Thinking
I hate to compare anything, especially while I’m promoting. I feel that’s another disrespect, but ‘Ocean’s 13’ is the best movie I’ve ever done in my life. No question.
BERNIE MAC

Another Disrespect Feel Hate Ocean

My family are police officers, detectives. My brother Mitch is FBI. Mitch is like that – a stern enforcer.

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My family are police officers, detectives. My brother Mitch is FBI. Mitch is like that – a stern enforcer.

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