Sex is the most beautiful thing that can take place between a happily married man and his secretary.
BARRY HUMPHRIESIf you have to explain satire to someone, you might as well give up.
More Barry Humphries Quotes
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The truth is deafening, no matter how softly it is spoken.
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Never be afraid to laugh at yourself, after all, you could be missing out on the joke of the century.
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The past is so reliable, so delightful and the best place to live.
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I know body hair bothers some women, but a lot of men like a fluffy partner.
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Sport is a loathsome and dangerous pursuit.
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New Zealand is a country of thirty thousand million sheep, three million of whom think they are human.
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Friendship is tested in the thick years of success rather than in the thin years of struggle.
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My mother used to say that there are no strangers, only friends you haven’t met yet. She’s now in a maximum security twilight home in Australia
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If you have to explain satire to someone, you might as well give up.
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Australia is an outdoor country. People only go inside to use the toilet. And that’s only a recent development.
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My parents were very pleased that I was in the army. The fact that I hated it somehow pleased them even more.
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It’s an old Aboriginal word meaning ‘Let’s get together and have fun’. They gave us the word because they had no further need for it.
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I drift along, thinking about the past a great deal. The past is so reliable, so delightful, and the best place to live. I end up there quite often, you know; it’s very comfortable and dependable.
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I think a lot of people think that we [comedians] are nerveless people in the theatre, that we don’t feel that kind of terror which traditionally anyone who has to do any public speaking feels. It’s worse for actors, because our livelihood depends on it.
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To live in Australia permanently is rather like going to a party and dancing all night with one’s mother.
BARRY HUMPHRIES