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New Zealand is a country of thirty thousand million sheep, three million of whom think they are human.

Barry Humphries

To live in Australia permanently is rather like going to a party and dancing all night with one’s mother.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Mother Night Party
Australia is an outdoor country. People only go inside to use the toilet. And that’s only a recent development.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Country Funny Humor
My parents were very pleased that I was in the army. The fact that I hated it somehow pleased them even more.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Army Children Parent
My mother used to say that there are no strangers, only friends you haven’t met yet. She’s now in a maximum security twilight home in Australia
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Friendship Funny Mom
It’s an old Aboriginal word meaning ‘Let’s get together and have fun’. They gave us the word because they had no further need for it.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Fun Needs Together
Never be afraid to laugh at yourself, after all, you could be missing out on the joke of the century.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Humor Laughing Memorable
I was born with a priceless gift, the ability to laugh at the misfortunes of others.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Funny Laughing Priceless
I drift along, thinking about the past a great deal. The past is so reliable, so delightful, and the best place to live. I end up there quite often, you know; it’s very comfortable and dependable.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Art Past Thinking
Sport is a loathsome and dangerous pursuit.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Inspirational Sports Pursuit Sports
Friendship is tested in the thick years of success rather than in the thin years of struggle.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Struggle Thick Years
If you have to explain satire to someone, you might as well give up.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Explain Give Up might Satire
I know body hair bothers some women, but a lot of men like a fluffy partner.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Body Bother Hair Men Some Women
Sex is the most beautiful thing that can take place between a happily married man and his secretary.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Beautiful Men Secretary Sex Thing
I think a lot of people think that we [comedians] are nerveless people in the theatre, that we don’t feel that kind of terror which traditionally anyone who has to do any public speaking feels. It’s worse for actors, because our livelihood depends on it.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Comedian People Thinking
There is no more terrible fate for a comedian than to be taken seriously.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Comedian Fate Seriously Taken Terrible
New Zealand is a country of thirty thousand million sheep, three million of whom think they are human.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Country Sheep Thinking

New Zealand is a country of thirty thousand million sheep, three million of whom think they are human.

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New Zealand is a country of thirty thousand million sheep, three million of whom think they are human.

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