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When people tell me I can’t do something, I have a visceral reflex to say, ‘Yes, I can.’

Angela Duckworth

You know, the things that I want my own daughters to develop – the idea that we’re going to get there through rewards and punishments seems completely at odds with the idea of character itself.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Character Daughter Develop Idea Itself Punishment Reward Seem Thing
Striving is exhausting. Sometimes I do say things like, ‘I wish I were not quite this driven to be excellent.’ It’s not a comfortable life. It’s not relaxed. I’m not relaxed as a person. I mean, I’m not unhappy. But… it’s the opposite of being comfortable.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Excellent Exhausting Life Quite Say Something Striving Thing Wish
Grit is living life like it’s a marathon, not a sprint.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Grit Life Living Marathon Spirit
Negative feelings are typical of learning, and you shouldn’t feel like you’re stupid when you’re frustrated doing something. You might say to yourself, ‘I can’t do this,’ but you should say, ‘That’s great.’ That means you really have the potential to learn something there.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Facial Feel Feeling Frustrate Learn Like Negative Something Stupid Typical
Grit may carry risk because it’s about putting all your eggs in one basket, to some extent.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Basket Carry Egg Extent Grit Put Some
If the quality and quantity of continuous effort toward goals matters as much as I think it does, we may actually get more productive, not less, as we get older – even if we can’t pull all-nighters like we used to.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Continue Goal Matter Much Quality Quantity Think Towards
Grit and self-control are related, but they’re not the same thing.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Control Grit Relate Same Self Thing
Very few people can keep going their whole life doing something and feel like it’s merely personally fascinating.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Do Fascinate Feel Few Going Keep Merely People Person Something Very
Grittier students are more likely to earn their diplomas; grittier teachers are more effective in the classroom.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Classroom Country Diploma Earn Effective Grittier Likely More People Place Student Teacher
I didn’t tell my kids, ‘You have to play viola, and you have to play piano.’ They chose these things on their own, and I don’t think we have to give kids every choice, but we do have to give them some choice because that autonomy is crucial for fostering passion.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Absorb Actual Complete Kid Piano Play Point Something Viola Well
There haven’t been genetic studies on grit, but we often think that challenge is inherited but grit is learned. That’s not what science says. Science says grit comes from both nature and nurture.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Challenge Genetic Girl Inherited Learn Science Studies
I think the very idea of character, of developing not just grit, but empathy and curiosity, emotional intelligence.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

But Character Develop Emotion Empathy Idea Intelligence Think
During all my undergrad years and in high school, I was involved in tutoring and public service. At Harvard, I spent over 35 hours a week doing service. I was a Big Sister, I worked for the homeless, the elderly; it was the epicenter of my focus.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

College Country During High Involve Public School Service Titoting Undergrad Year
I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about my genes because I can’t do anything about them.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Anything Genes Lot Spent Them Think
I worked hard when I was a consultant. I worked hard when I was in graduate school looking at neuroscience.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Consultant Gratitude Hard Harder Look Neuroscience School Work Worker
If you are a young person who is wanting to develop a passion, you cannot expect anyone else to tell you what that passion would be.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Develop Passion Person Want Young

When people tell me I can’t do something, I have a visceral reflex to say, ‘Yes, I can.’

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When people tell me I can’t do something, I have a visceral reflex to say, ‘Yes, I can.’

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