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I’m just a no-good, scum sucking, nose picking, boot licking, sniveling, groveling, worthless hunk of slime.

Al Yankovic

You don’t need to be defined by your job.
AL YANKOVIC

Defined Job Need
He put Ben Gay inside my jock strap and filled my tooth paste tube up with glue.
AL YANKOVIC

Gay Inside Jock Paste Revenge Strap Tooth Tube
People that were a little nerdy in high school would look up to me and know it gets better.
AL YANKOVIC

Get Better People School
I do a lot of different things, sometimes at the same time, and it’s very difficult to figure out where I fit.
AL YANKOVIC

Different Difficult Figure Out Same Sometimes Thing
I was a huge fan of ‘Mad’ magazine when I was 11, 12, 13 years old. I’d scour used bookstores trying to find back issues, and I’d wait at the newsstand for a new issue to come out. My life revolved around it.
AL YANKOVIC

Around Bookstore Fan Find Huge Issue Life Magazine Old Scour Revolve
If something is good enough, it can be out there and people will see it.
AL YANKOVIC

Enough Good People See Something
I’d rather clean all the bathrooms in Grand Central Station with my tongue than spend one more minute with you.
AL YANKOVIC

Bathroom Clean Grand Minute Spend Station Tongue
At this point I’ve got a bit of a track record. So people realize that when ‘Weird Al’ wants to go parody, it’s not meant to make them look bad… it’s meant to be a tribute.
AL YANKOVIC

Bad Bookstore Look Point Record Scour Track Tribute Try
As a wise man once said, “April Fools Day is for amateurs. You NEVER need an excuse to mess with people’s heads.”
AL YANKOVIC

April Day Excuse Fool Man never People Wise
I try not to go the obvious route all the time, but sometimes the most obvious is actually the best.
AL YANKOVIC

Actual Best Most Obvious Route Sometimes Try
That’s something the kids should know about. Reading is a gateway to witchcraft and lesbianism.
AL YANKOVIC

Gateway Kid Lesbian Read Something Witchcraft
One of the hardest things I’ve had to deal with in my career is keeping my material topical even though I only release albums every three or four years.
AL YANKOVIC

Album Career Deel Keep Material Three Topical Year
I’ve done a movie and a TV series, and someday I’d like to do a successful movie and a successful TV series. That would be nice.
AL YANKOVIC

Movie Nice Series Successful Television Would
As it turns out, there is a thing called the Internet, and stuff does go out there whether the suits like it or not.
AL YANKOVIC

Doe Internet Like Out Stuff Suit Turn
It doesn’t take a military genius to see we’ll all be crispy critters after World War III.
AL YANKOVIC

Critter Genius Look Military Peace School Second War World
As much as people are griping about the Internet taking sales away from artists, it’s been a huge promotional tool for me.
AL YANKOVIC

Artist Grip Huge Much People Promotion Tool

I’m just a no-good, scum sucking, nose picking, boot licking, sniveling, groveling, worthless hunk of slime.

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I’m just a no-good, scum sucking, nose picking, boot licking, sniveling, groveling, worthless hunk of slime.

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