“If winning weren’t important nobody would keep score.”

I went into a restaurant one night and ordered lobster, and the waiter brought me one with a claw missing.

Life is what you allow yourself not to see.

Do what you have to do as long as you don’t hurt people.

You can always tell the Catholic schools by the length of the cheerleaders’ skirts.

Winning is only important in war and surgery.

I come from New York where, if you fall down, someone will pick you up by your wallet.

Every obnoxious fan has a wife at home that dominates him.

If the waitress has dirty ankles, the chili is good.

The next time I will cry is when I die. My life has been that beautiful.

We rush for the stars as we crawl toward our graves.

I had my moment on the stage. The trick in life is to know when to leave.

God didn’t miss any of us.

It bothers me that the average fan, the average sportswriter for that matter, pays so much attention to what’s in a box score.

Help one kid at a time. He’ll maybe go back and help a few more.

You measure a player from the head up.

I tell the players that they can’t relive any day in their lives and that they can’t relive the minutes of a game.

No matter what you’re going through, it makes you forget about your problems. I think the world should keep laughing.

You gotta keep the ball off the fat part of the bat.

People need a sacred narrative. They must have a sense of larger purpose, in one form or another, however intellectualized. They will find a way to keep ancestral spirits alive.

You can’t keep your team together, and you are going to have more changes all the time. Personnel decisions aren’t always made by you, especially who you bring to your team.

On this team, we’re all united in a common goal: to keep my job.

When people have success, one of two things happen. They either get really satisfied and want to keep thinking about it and talking about what they did, or the success becomes a little addictive, and it makes them want to keep having more.

If they lose, then their life has somehow been diminished. I’m not that way, and it keeps me steady.

I write to keep from going mad from the contradictions I find among mankind – and to work some of those contradictions out for myself.