Go ahead, take out your dong.’ ‘I’m not taking out my dong. And by the way, who uses the word dong?

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Go ahead, take out your dong.’ ‘I’m not taking out my dong. And by the way, who uses the word dong?

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I become sand toy repo man from the eight little kids that run off in nine different directions with my sand toys.

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I become sand toy repo man from the eight little kids that run off in nine different directions with my sand toys.
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Stop throwing us all together like some sort of Puerto Ricaminican Tex-Mex buffet.

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Stop throwing us all together like some sort of Puerto Ricaminican Tex-Mex buffet.
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The horrible truth is that I am lazy and I am going to write and do bits that just hand themselves to me.

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The horrible truth is that I am lazy and I am going to write and do bits that just hand themselves to me.
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Don’t bring your sand toys to the park. That’s another bad move. Because I go to the park, and I’m on the Vicodin and a little weed too – let’s face it – and I go in there, and my wife’s like.

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Don’t bring your sand toys to the park. That’s another bad move. Because I go to the park, and I’m on the Vicodin and a little weed too – let’s face it – and I go in there, and my wife’s like.
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Another Bring Go Like Move Park Sand Toy Weed
Minding my own business, humming out a ‘Frere Jacques’ – and I realized that in any other town, this might be considered cute. But you know what it is in San Francisco? Sexy.

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Minding my own business, humming out a ‘Frere Jacques’ – and I realized that in any other town, this might be considered cute. But you know what it is in San Francisco? Sexy.
AL MADRIGAL

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Bring the sand toys! Bring the sand toys!’ And I know what happens every single time.

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Bring the sand toys! Bring the sand toys!’ And I know what happens every single time.
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Bring Every Know Sand Single Toy
I go back with this woman down a murky hallway, and then without missing a beat – these ladies are all business – she goes.

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I go back with this woman down a murky hallway, and then without missing a beat – these ladies are all business – she goes.
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Im so sick of people treating Latinos like some homogenous group that all feel the same way about everything.

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Im so sick of people treating Latinos like some homogenous group that all feel the same way about everything.
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I bullshit on the phone all day with a variety of people discussing various projects, and occasionally write jokes.

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I bullshit on the phone all day with a variety of people discussing various projects, and occasionally write jokes.
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Go ahead, take out your dong.’ ‘I’m not taking out my dong. And by the way, who uses the word dong?

AL MADRIGAL

Go ahead, take out your dong.’ ‘I’m not taking out my dong. And by the way, who uses the word dong?
AL MADRIGAL

Ahead Do Dong Take Use Way
I’m always alone. Sad face emoticon.

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I’m always alone. Sad face emoticon.
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If you want to be hip to the lingo, they’re not using the word dong up in the States.

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If you want to be hip to the lingo, they’re not using the word dong up in the States.
AL MADRIGAL

Dong Hip Hop Lingo Use Word
Well, once I fried tofu and put Sriracha on it. After that I was so depressed I swore off preparing food for myself altogether.

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Well, once I fried tofu and put Sriracha on it. After that I was so depressed I swore off preparing food for myself altogether.
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Depress Fried Once Sriracha Swore Tofu Together Well
You grow up real quick, a half-Mexican in a sailor’s suit, because I’d be riding the streetcar to school everyday.

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You grow up real quick, a half-Mexican in a sailor’s suit, because I’d be riding the streetcar to school everyday.
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We’re down in Mexico. It’s for a bachelor party, so we go into a Mexican strip club.

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We’re down in Mexico. It’s for a bachelor party, so we go into a Mexican strip club.
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My primary responsibility is to be funny.

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My primary responsibility is to be funny.
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Be Primarie Responsibility To

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