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I wish I had spent more time at the office and less time in prison.

Al Franken

The government must give proper weight to both keeping America safe from terrorists and protecting Americans’ privacy.
AL FRANKEN

Country Government Keep Knowing Privacy Proper Protect Safe Terrorist Weight
I ask the American people not to fall victim to disinformation. There are no death panels. The Affordable Care Act cuts the deficit.
AL FRANKEN

Country Cut Death Disinformation Fall No Panel People Victim
We need an investigation, because we don’t know what Donald Trump owes Russia.
AL FRANKEN

Country Investigate Need Owe President
Anyone with an Internet connection and a few dollars can obtain personal information they should never have access to, including a user’s date of birth, e-mail address, or estimated income.
AL FRANKEN

Access Address Anyone Birth Connection Dollar E-mail Estimate Few Income Information Internet never Obtain Personal User
My spiritual life is… sometimes I have access to it and sometimes I don’t. When I do have access to it, it’s usually a sense of my understanding what the best course of action or the best thing for me to do.
AL FRANKEN

Access Life Mean Real Sometimes Spiritual
Tend to be people who didn’t take S.A.T.s, or first-time voters, or people with English as a second language.
AL FRANKEN

English First Language People Second Tend Time Voter
My dad didn’t graduate from high school, ended up being a printing salesman, probably never made more than $8,000 a year.
AL FRANKEN

Dad End Graduate Mom Print Real Salesman School
I am a Minnesotan, and not just because I root for the Vikings and the Twins. I like the Minnesota-nice sensibility.
AL FRANKEN

Fight Just Like Minnesotan Nice Root Sensible Twin Viking
There is – I mean – I found early in life that righteous indignation is a little off-putting, and so I try to couch it with humor.
AL FRANKEN

Coach Early Found Humor Indignation Little Mean Pulling Righteous Try
When I first started writing for television in the seventies and eighties, the Internet didn’t exist.
AL FRANKEN

Eighties Exist Interest Seventies Show Start Television Worry Write
I know that it’s probably not a good idea for a comedian, especially a satirist, to support a public policy group or a politician.
AL FRANKEN

Comedian Especially God Group Idea Policy Population Probably Public Satirist Support Year
You know, Lincoln was funny. I don’t think F.D.R. was very funny. But Lincoln was funny. Lincoln was really funny. But I think you should get elected first, and then show that you’re funny.
AL FRANKEN

Elect First Funny People Really Should Show Think
The civil rights movement was very important in my house, and then Vietnam was very important ’cause there were two boys, so I came of age during a very heated political climate.
AL FRANKEN

Boy Civil Climate Country House Important Movement Political Right Two Very
Let’s keep the Internet weird. Let’s keep the Internet free.
AL FRANKEN

Free Internet Keep Let Weird
Sometimes if I tell people, ‘I’m afraid that I’m really a fraud,’ or ‘I have a lot of self-doubt,’ they go.
AL FRANKEN

Afraid Doubt Fraud Go Lot People Self Sometimes Tell
There is a subset of Democrats who tend to mis-fill out ballots. The way you mark the ballot is like an S.A.T. – you fill in the circle. And the subset of people who tend to, like, put a check there instead, or an X, or fill it out wrong.
AL FRANKEN

Afraid Ballot Check Circle Mis-fill Our People Subset Tend Voter Wrong

I wish I had spent more time at the office and less time in prison.

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I wish I had spent more time at the office and less time in prison.

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