I’m crushed by the responsibility of writing a satirical book.
AL FRANKENWhen a company is able to establish a dominant market position, consumers lose meaningful choices.
More Al Franken Quotes
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The guy who ran it at first misled pretty much everybody about how much capital we had.
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Why don’t we focus on what Afghan women can do? They can cook, bear children, and pray. As I recall, that was fine for our grandmothers.
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We need an investigation, because we don’t know what Donald Trump owes Russia.
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Some of my colleagues seem more interested in using every procedural method possible to keep the Senate from doing anything than they are in creating jobs or helping Americans struggling in a difficult economy.
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Some of George W. Bush’s friends say that Bush believes God called him to be president during these times of trial.
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My dad didn’t graduate from high school, ended up being a printing salesman, probably never made more than $8,000 a year.
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We don’t know how many Russian oligarchs have invested in his business.
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The Freedom of Information Act doesn’t apply to Silicon Valley. And you can’t impeach Google if it breaks its ‘Don’t be evil’ campaign pledge.
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As a source of innovation, an engine of our economy, and a forum for our political discourse.
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I get satisfaction when I write something I like, when I’m happy with it.
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Sometimes if I tell people, ‘I’m afraid that I’m really a fraud,’ or ‘I have a lot of self-doubt,’ they go.
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Let’s keep the Internet weird. Let’s keep the Internet free.
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Humor and seriousness are not in opposition to each other.
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It’s easier to put on slippers than to carpet the whole world.
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But adult love means you’re not in denial, and you want the loved one to be the best they can be.
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