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But here in New York I was ignorant, insignificant, unimportant–one in millions whose destiny concerned no one. New York did not even know of my existence. Nor did it care.

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I have loved and bitterness left me for that hour. But there are times when love itself is bitter.
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I would not let it ruin me as it ruined others! I would speak only with money, hard money.
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I forgot the songs they sung – and most of those songs are now dead; I erased their dialect from my tongue.
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There were fifty-four women and forty little boys with the Red Army prisoners, and I went daily to take care of them also.
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Now, being a girl, I was ashamed of my body and my lack of strength. So I tried to be a man.
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I have always detested the belief that sex is the chief bond between man and woman.
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But there were years when, in search of what I thought was better, nobler things I denied these, my people, and my family.
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And the woman who could win the respect of man was often the woman who could knock him down with her bare fists and sit on him until he yelled for help.
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I shot, rode, jumped, and took part in all the fights of the boys.
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Yet it is awful to love a person who is a torture to you. And a fascinating person who loves you and won’t hear of anything but your loving him and living right by his side through all eternity!
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There’s something dreadfully decisive about a beheading.
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I was learning that books and diagrams can be evil things if they deaden the mind of man and make him blind or cynical before subjection of any kind.
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To die would have been beautiful. But I belong to those who do not die for the sake of beauty.
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But here in New York I was ignorant, insignificant, unimportant–one in millions whose destiny concerned no one. New York did not even know of my existence. Nor did it care.
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I joined another circle and the leader gave us a little leaflet in very small print, asking us to read it carefully and then come prepared to ask questions.
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But settled things were enemies to me and soon lost their newness and color. The unknown called.
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