Lovers, of course, are notoriously frantic epistemologists, second only to paranoiacs (and analysts) as readers of signs and wonders.
ADAM PHILLIPSWhen we define ourselves by what we can recognize, by what we can comprehend- rather than, say, by what we can describe
More Adam Phillips Quotes
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It is as if to say: if these are not valued – if these forms of wanting and feeling and speaking and doing – are not cultivated and encouraged and rewarded in the child, then the child will be mad.
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The big secret about Art is that no one wants it to be true.
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Everybody is dealing with how much of their own aliveness they can bear and how much they need to anesthetize themselves.
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To keep faith with recognition we have to stay recognizable.
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There is nothing more scandalous than a happy marriage
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We are children for a very long time.
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I am always true to myself, that is the problem. Who else could I be true to?
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When we define ourselves by what we can recognize, by what we can comprehend- rather than, say, by what we can describe
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You write to find out what you believe.
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The whole notion of sanity may be an attempt to medicalize morality – to speak of the good in the language of health: to make us more accurate, more scientific in our wanting – but by the same token it becomes a form of moral blackmail.
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Tragic heroes are failed pragmatists. Their ends are unrealistic and their means are impractical.
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One thing you discover in psychoanalytic treatment is the limits of what you can change about yourself or your life.
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We have been taught to wish for it, but the wish to be understood may be our most vengeful demand, may be the way we hang on, as adults ,
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There is always a ..belief that by destroying the thing that we love we destroy our needs
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We are tyrannized by our blind spots, and by whatever it is about ourselves that we find unacceptable.
ADAM PHILLIPS