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Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor.

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Doctor Finish Idiot League Motivational Sports School

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Coaches who shoot par in the summer are the guys I want on my schedule in the winter.
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Coach Guy Schedule Shoot Summer Winter
They wanted to buy out my contract, but I couldn’t make change for a $20, so they had to let me stay.
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Contract Sports Stay Wanted
Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor.
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Doctor Finish Idiot League Motivational Sports School
You may be big in New York, but in Walters, Oklahoma, you’re nobody.
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Big Country Nobody Sport State Walter
I’d rather be a football coach. That way you only lose eleven games a year.
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Coach Eleven Football Game Rather Year
You always catch the wrong players.
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Catch Player Psychology Sport Wrong
Hell no. When I die I want to be sick.
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Die Hell No Sick Sport Want
We did have three go to the YMCA.
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Basketball College Go Three
I don’t have any tricky plays. I’d rather have tricky players.
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Game Play Player Rather Tricky
The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off.
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Day Got never Off Retirement Trouble
Damn referees, I’ll miss them less than anybody.
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Anybody Damn Less Miss Missing Referee
You mean in the state?
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Live Mean Sport State
I don’t understand these new coaches who don’t drink. What do they do when they get beat?
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Beat Drink Leadership New Sports Understand
Doctors bury their mistakes, but mine are still on scholarship.
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Bury Doctor Mine Mistake Scholarship Still
If I make a set of rules, then a guy goes out and steals an airplane. He comes back and says, ‘It wasn’t in the rules.’
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Airplane Come Back Game Guy Rule Set Sport Steal

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