I haven’t left my house in days. I watch the news channels incessantly. All the news stories are about the election; all the commercials are Viagra and Cialis. Election, erection, election, erection! Either way we’re screwed!
BETTE MIDLERA lot of people have no access to beauty. When I was growing up, my mother had only a few pretty things to look at.
More Bette Midler Quotes
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I have a ball – and it keeps my heart rate up. I get to wear fabulous clothes. I get to make people laugh. That’s my core business, and that’s where I’ll always return.
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Here I am, one of the most colorful women of my time – if not of my block – being made to sound positively legumelike in printed interviews.
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If somebody makes me laugh, I’m his slave for life.
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I want to have fun, and I want to give people a good laugh.
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When I started in this [music] business, I had a dream, but it was amorphous, and I had no experience. I just had a fuzzy notion of what life would be like if I became what I pictured.
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I always try to balance the light with the heavy – a few tears of human spirit in with the sequins and the fringes.
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The [film] business is run by men, and they’re basically interested in their own species, and they’re not so interested in women belonging to the human race.
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My parents have not insisted that we go to college, but she wanted us to learn. Teacher, librarian, secretary, nurse. All my siblings were employed. But I wanted to be the boss, an independent contractor.
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If someone were to say seriously, “I’m divine,” she’d have to be locked up. There are lots of people in mental institutions going around saying “I’m God.” But because I’m funny about it, they haven’t locked me up yet. And I don’t give myself airs, either.
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Previously, the jokes were more related to current issues, political. Today people make about each other either funny or about people like Kim Kardashian. It’s brutal. Everything is so much vielschmutziger.
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When you reach a certain age, you have fulfilled your childhood dream and whatever your first or second adulthood led you to do. T
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Do you want to live and work in a garbage dump? I don’t. That’s partly because I grew up in the most pristine environment possible – Hawaii, where it is sacrilege to leave your garbage on the ground.
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Even if the whole human race dies off because we keep fighting and killing each other and being heartless, the planet will take care of itself. Eventually, after millions of years.
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If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to do it?
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Do I understand this right? I’m being marked down?
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It’s important that you all agree on what the parameters are and what you can accomplish – and not get pissed off or beat yourself up for what you can’t accomplish.
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I married a German. Every night I dress up as Poland and he invades me.
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If you’re passionate about something, then you should pick up your flag and run with it.
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Me, I’m just a hack. I’m just a schlep-per. I just do what I can do.
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It is true that in this culture, they throw you out when you get older. I see it all the time, especially in my business. At my age, you’re playing somebody’s mother – and there aren’t even a lot of those roles!
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Everyone goes through their winters and springs, and their summers and autumns.
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I have my standards. They’re low, but I have them.
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[On Helen Reddy:] She ought to be arrested for loitering in front of an orchestra.
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[On Denmark:] … that little country of cottage cheese and courage.
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I read a comment that made me think I should stop singing for a while. And I didn’t want to stop singing, because it was the only thing I loved. At first I thought,
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A lot of people started drinking martinis and smoking cigarettes because they felt it was cool.
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