“I feel more like I’m doing a play whose main character just happens to share my name.”

This is their real life – texting about trivial things; listening to numbing music on their private headphones. The machines block everything out – you create your own little trivial world.

The truth is the committed left press in America is not longer interest in reporting the news.

I don’t know of any government leaders that are killers.

The government cannot overcome bad parenting. What our leaders can do is publicly condemn irresponsible parental behavior in vivid terms.

Safety nets for the poor and disadvantaged are a must for any compassionate nation, but encouraging folks to go on the dole when not absolutely necessary is disgraceful.

Drive through a yellow light, and you may be ticketed thanks to a camera tied onto a pole. Everybody’s watching everything. And then sending it out to the world via email.

I don’t care about the Constitution! The Constitution isn’t here; you’re here. Don’t be a pinhead.

Yet, many of us in America stay far, far away from this topic. That in itself is a national scandal. Bad parenting is gravely harming this nation.

Each segment has to pay off, so you have to look at it in a very, very micro-level and make each chapter in the book, each segment on a TV show, entertaining and informative, and if you do that then a cumulative affect will be success.

Sociologists well understand that chaos at home causes violent behavior, educational failure and social alienation among children.

Whenever I go on a show with a comedian I just counter punch.

I think the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals abused its power all day long.

I would decriminalize marijuana, but you step out of your house high and you bother somebody else in any way, shape or form, I’m going to slap a fine on you that’s going to curl your hair!

I used to be a wicked disco guy.

When I die, I don’t want my demise to be used as a political rally, and that’s what happened yesterday.

Jobs that cannot be delivered must never be promised. It’s unfair to raise people’s hopes that way.

I never even visualized for a second doing what I’m doing.

I understand that anything actors are doing, good or bad, is motivated by fear.

My business is not reading your messages. I don’t have a business doing that. And it’s against my values to do that. I don’t want to read your private stuff.

Fear is a sign-usually a sign that I’m doing something right.

I’ve always liked working really hard and then doing nothing in particular. So, consequently, I didn’t overexpose myself; I guess I maintained a kind of mystery. I wasn’t ambitious.

You do not have to sleep with a comedian to learn what you’re doing. Male comedians will not like that advice, but it is the truth.

I don’t go out unless I’m working. My quality time is when I’m doing nothing.

And you’d sure better not be doing it because it’s a way to make a living, ’cause that ain’t always going to be easy. You got to believe it, believe in the music. You got to mean it.