“Everyone just wants to hear the exact jokes that apply to them and want to – everyone wants a perfectly crafted joke for them.”

It’s very confusing to me why people take comedians so seriously.

If I make a joke about black people or Asian people or whatever, and then an Asian comes up to me afterwards and says, “That joke offended me,” I’m still more or less not going to listen, but at least it makes sense, like I said something that was about them.

Comedian makes the statement that just isn’t true.

Most of the times to be honest with you, I get sexually harassed certainly more than I do to females, because… they are comfortable with me, and because they know I can’t take it to a dangerous place.

Now, I’ve gotten to the point in my career, I’m 13 years in, to where I know that I’m funny. I know that I’m good at this.

I treat people based on who they really are, not the name. Everyone has to be respectful and be a human being. No one’s above… That’s how I carry it with anybody.

I get along with everyone except for men my age, who are bourgeois or retired or boring.

Sooner or later in life everyone discovers that perfect happiness is unrealizable, but there are few who pause to consider the antithesis: that perfect unhappiness is equally unattainable.

Everyone takes a bad selfie – the first thing is to know that.

We’re all Africans, everyone – black, white, yellow.

To travel is to discover that everyone is wrong about other countries.

This party is a bit like an old stagecoach. If you drive along at a rapid rate everyone aboard is either so exhilarated or so seasick that you don’t have a lot of difficulty.

I think everyone’s always interested in playing a spy, right? That’s something we grow up admiring, which is so strange, but it’s just a very clever and quick world that we all want to be a part of.