If there’s anything I hate more than not being taken seriously, it’s being taken too seriously.
BILLY WILDERJerry: Oh, you don’t understand, Osgood! Ehhhh… I’m a man. Osgood: Well, nobody’s perfect.
More Billy Wilder Quotes
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Writers became much more important when sound came in, but they’ve had to put up a valiant fight to get the credit they deserve.
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If you have a problem with the third act, the real problem is in the first act.
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France is a place where the money falls apart in your hands but you can’t tear the toilet paper.
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God save me from myself.
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I have ten commandments. The first nine are, thou shalt not bore. The tenth is, thou shalt have right of final cut.
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A bad play folds and is forgotten, but in pictures we don’t bury our dead. When you think it’s out of your system, your daughter sees it on television and says, My father is an idiot.
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My English is a mixture between Arnold Schwarzenegger and Archbishop Tutu.
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I am big. It’s the pictures that got small.
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A director must be a policeman, a midwife, a psychoanalyst, a sycophant and a bastard.
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Hollywood didn’t kill Marilyn Monroe, it’s the Marilyn Monroes who are killing Hollywood.
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If you’re going to tell people the truth, be funny or they’ll kill you.
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We are on the track of something absolutely mediocre.
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You know, that stuff about pink elephants, that’s the bunk. It’s little animals. Little tiny turkeys in straw hats. Midget monkeys coming through the keyholes.
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I’m delighted with it, because it used to be that films were the lowest form of art. Now we’ve got something to look down on.
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I met a lot of hard-boiled eggs in my life, but you – you’re twenty minutes.
BILLY WILDER