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I want to have fun, and I want to give people a good laugh.

Bette Midler

Previously, the jokes were more related to current issues, political. Today people make about each other either funny or about people like Kim Kardashian. It’s brutal. Everything is so much vielschmutziger.
BETTE MIDLER

Brutal People Previously Today
Sometimes you have to make your own opportunities, and that’s why I’m on TV. I wasn’t going to sit around anymore, waiting for the damn phone to ring. I had to create my own place – I’ve always done that.
BETTE MIDLER

Opportunity Phones Waiting
Writing a book is not as tough as it is to haul thirty-five people around the country and sweat like a horse five nights a week.
BETTE MIDLER

Book Country Horse
A lot of people started drinking martinis and smoking cigarettes because they felt it was cool.
BETTE MIDLER

Cigarettes Cool Smoking
The outside world doesn’t have a lot to offer. You have to make your own heaven in your own home.
BETTE MIDLER

Heaven Home World
Do you want to live and work in a garbage dump? I don’t. That’s partly because I grew up in the most pristine environment possible – Hawaii, where it is sacrilege to leave your garbage on the ground.
BETTE MIDLER

Dump Garbage Possible Wanted
it will cleanse itself, and new life forms, maybe better ones, will come. Meanwhile, we’ll have gotten exactly what we deserved: annihilation.
BETTE MIDLER

Annihilation Costume Exactly Gotten
If only I’d known my differentness would be an asset, then my earlier life would have been much easier.
BETTE MIDLER

Actresses Being Different Singers
Everyone goes through their winters and springs, and their summers and autumns.
BETTE MIDLER

Autumn Spring Summer
I’ve always said we got married because there was nothing on TV.
BETTE MIDLER

Always Breakup Married
I tried to charm the pants off Bob Dylan, but everyone will be disappointed to learn that I was unsuccessful. I got close – a couple of fast feels in the front seat of a Cadillac.
BETTE MIDLER

Cadillacs Couple Sex
One of my first role models was Eugene Lang, a wealthy businessman who went back to his elementary school in East Harlem and addressed the sixth-grade class. He looked out at that sea of faces and said, “If any of you wants to go to college, I will pay for it.”
BETTE MIDLER

College Kids School
I love nature, in spite of what it did to me.
BETTE MIDLER

Nature Love Spite
There’s the media-driven universe, in which the public perceives you in a superficial way. Then there’s the universe that you actually inhabit, where you have to get up even if you didn’t sleep so well, and you feel like crap and your face is swollen.
BETTE MIDLER

Media Sleep Way
[On Helen Reddy:] She ought to be arrested for loitering in front of an orchestra.
BETTE MIDLER

Helen Orchestra Singing
If you’re frightened, you’re out of luck.
BETTE MIDLER

Frightened Luck Out

I want to have fun, and I want to give people a good laugh.

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I want to have fun, and I want to give people a good laugh.

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Popular Authors

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