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I’ve always said we got married because there was nothing on TV.

Bette Midler

I always look old when I work because I get so upset and tense that my face wrinkles up like a prune, I can’t stop it.
BETTE MIDLER

Pruned Tense Upset
I haven’t left my house in days. I watch the news channels incessantly. All the news stories are about the election; all the commercials are Viagra and Cialis. Election, erection, election, erection! Either way we’re screwed!
BETTE MIDLER

House News Stories Watches
A person’s life is a journey, a road. Sometimes you go off the road and sometimes you stay on all the way through. But you are the only one on that road. It’s your road.
BETTE MIDLER

Journey Sometimes Way
People are not the best because they work hard. They work hard because they are the best.
BETTE MIDLER

Best Hard People Work
If you’re frightened, you’re out of luck.
BETTE MIDLER

Frightened Luck Out
Let the sun stop burning, Let them tell me love’s not worth going through. If it all falls apart, I will know deep in my heart, The only dream that mattered had come true …In this life I was loved by you.
BETTE MIDLER

Life Love Romantic
I want it all – and I would like it delivered.
BETTE MIDLER

All Delivered Want
hen you’re in your third adulthood, the one that leads to the grave, and you ask yourself, “What will I do between now and then?” Instead of thinking in terms of glamour, you start thinking in terms of reform – your contribution to the world.
BETTE MIDLER

Ask Glamorous Grave Think Yourself
I’m confident that I’m as intelligent as many people, but I know that I’m not as intelligent as some. So in the presence of hyperintelligent people, I’m a shrinking violet because I don’t want to look like a fool. I know a little about a lot and a lot about a little.
BETTE MIDLER

Intelligent People Shrinking
The first time I saw a picture of [fabled actress] Ethel Barrymore – she was on Broadway and she was wearing pearls. I thought, “That’s who I should grow up to be.” It’s odd, because it was her physical image that I wanted;
BETTE MIDLER

Bombarded Grow Up Ideas
I’ve forbidden my daughter to have grandchildren, I’m too young.
BETTE MIDLER

Daughter Grandchildren Young
I’ve always been lucky enough to have great audiences. It has been quite a life.
BETTE MIDLER

Audience Enough Lucky
Previously, the jokes were more related to current issues, political. Today people make about each other either funny or about people like Kim Kardashian. It’s brutal. Everything is so much vielschmutziger.
BETTE MIDLER

Brutal People Previously Today
I’ve always said we got married because there was nothing on TV.
BETTE MIDLER

Always Breakup Married
I never know how much of what I say is true.
BETTE MIDLER

Cynicism Funny Truth
Honey, I can smell the scent of another woman from 500 paces.
BETTE MIDLER

Infidelity Pace Smell

I’ve always said we got married because there was nothing on TV.

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I’ve always said we got married because there was nothing on TV.

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