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The war between the sexes is the only one in which both sides regularly sleep with the enemy.

Quentin Crisp

The world now seems a stunningly ignoble place. It has not really grown all that much worse but appears to have done so because we know so much more about it than we did.
QUENTIN CRISP

Appear Done Grown Ignoble Much Now Place Really Seem Stunningly Word
The happiest moments in any affair take place after the loved one has learned to accommodate the lover and before the maddening personality of either party has emerged like a jagged rock from the receding tides of lust and curiosity.
QUENTIN CRISP

Accommodate Affair Before Happiest Learn Love Lover Maddening Moment Personality Place Take
Love is the extra effort we make in our dealings with those whom we do not like and once you understand that, you understand all. This idea that love overtakes you is nonsense. This is but a polite manifestation of sex. To love another you have to undertake some fragment of their destiny.
QUENTIN CRISP

Deal Effort Extra Like Love Make One Out Understand
Abatement in the hostility of one’s enemies must never be thought to signify they have been won over. It only means that one has ceased to constitute a threat.
QUENTIN CRISP

Abatement Been Enemy Hostility Over Signify Through Won
If I were God – and I never understand why I’m not – I should say, “Shop around, I don’t think you’ll find a better bargain than here.”
QUENTIN CRISP

Around Bargain Better Find God Shop Should Think Understand
The trouble with children is that they’re not returnable.
QUENTIN CRISP

Children Returnable Trouble
If you describe things as better than they are, you are considered to be a romantic; if you describe things as worse than they are, you will be called a realist; and if you describe things exactly as they are, you will be thought of as a satirist.
QUENTIN CRISP

Be Better Consider Describe Romantic Thing Will Worse
The trouble with European cities is that they are drenched in their history, almost all of which is terrible.
QUENTIN CRISP

Almost City Country Drench History Terrible Trouble
It may be true that artists adopt a flamboyant appearance, but it’s also true that people who look funny get stuck with the arts.
QUENTIN CRISP

Adopt Also Appearance Art Artist Flamboyant Funny Look People Stuck True
The English think that incompetence is the same thing as sincerity.
QUENTIN CRISP

English Incompetence Same Sincerity Thing Think
You will survive if you believe in yourself.
QUENTIN CRISP

Believe Survive Yourself
When I told the people of Northern Ireland that I was an atheist, a woman in the audience stood up and said, ‘Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the Protestants in whom you don’t believe?’
QUENTIN CRISP

Atheist Audience Believe Catholics Country God Northern People Protestants Said Stood Took Woman Yes
The formula for achieving a successful relationship is simple: you should treat all disasters as if they were trivialities but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster.
QUENTIN CRISP

Achieve Disaster Formula never Relationship Simple Successful Treat Trivialities
You can’t be a person and a lady. If you’re a person, you can open the damned door yourself.
QUENTIN CRISP

Dammed Door Lady Open Person Yourself
I went out into the world when I was about 22. I wrote books and I illustrated books and did book covers, and I taught tap-dancing, and I was a model in the art school. I had no ability for any of those things, but what else could I do?
QUENTIN CRISP

Ability Art Bool Cover Dance Illustrated Model School Tap Taught Tow Twenty Went World
The search for a life-style involves a journey to the interior. This is not altogether a pleasant experience, because you not only have to take stock of what you consider your assets but you also have to take a long look at what your friends call “the trouble with you.” Nevertheless, the journey is worth making.
QUENTIN CRISP

Interior Involve Journey Search Style

The war between the sexes is the only one in which both sides regularly sleep with the enemy.

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The war between the sexes is the only one in which both sides regularly sleep with the enemy.

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