The trouble with children is that they’re not returnable.
QUENTIN CRISPAs we all know from witnessing the consuming jealousy of husbands who are never faithful, people do not confine themselves to the emotions to which they are entitled.
More Quentin Crisp Quotes
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Mainstream people dislike homosexuality because they can’t help concentrating on what homosexual men do to one another. And when you contemplate what people do, you think of yourself doing it. And they don’t like that. That’s the famous joke:
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Though intelligence is powerless to modify character, it is a dab hand at finding euphemisms for its weaknesses.
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The trouble with European cities is that they are drenched in their history, almost all of which is terrible.
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In an expanding universe, time is on the side of the outcast. Those who once inhabited the suburbs of human contempt find that without changing their address they eventually live in the metropolis.
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For flavor, instant sex will never supersede the stuff you have to peel and cook.
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To love another person you have to undertake some fragment of their destiny.
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Nothing more rapidly inclines a person to go into a monastery than reading a book on etiquette. There are so many trivial ways in which it is possible to commit some social sin.
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The formula for achieving a successful relationship is simple: you should treat all disasters as if they were trivialities but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster.
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You don’t have to deal with anyone in America. They accept you the way you are.
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It’s a strange situation, but people will pay your fare to get you to go and tell them how to be happy.
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No effort is required to define or even attain happiness, but enormous concentration is needed to abandon everything else.
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The gymnasiacs of Venice, in California, are so addicted to these practices that there has arisen a nation of men who can no longer put their arms against their sides
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He knew them only ‘in Braille’ – the curtains were never drawn back in the rooms in Oxford where he met those boys. It was the most sordid life you can imagine. And he was bleating about love and dragging the fair name of Mr. Plato into the trial – after a life like that?
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People are not heterosexual or homosexual, just sexual.
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Assoon as I stepped out of my mother’s womb on to dry land, I realized that I had made a mistake?but the trouble with children is that they are not returnable.
QUENTIN CRISP