Keeping up with the Joneses was a full-time job with my mother and father. It was not until many years later when I lived alone that I realized how much cheaper it was to drag the Joneses down to my level.
QUENTIN CRISPThe trouble with European cities is that they are drenched in their history, almost all of which is terrible.
More Quentin Crisp Quotes
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I went out into the world when I was about 22. I wrote books and I illustrated books and did book covers, and I taught tap-dancing, and I was a model in the art school. I had no ability for any of those things, but what else could I do?
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Health consists of having the same diseases as one’s neighbors.
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Development of character consists solely in moving toward self-sufficiency.
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Quentin Crisp (to handsome young man on the street): “What’s the matter, sexy? Don’t you like dehydrated fruit?
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Abatement in the hostility of one’s enemies must never be thought to signify they have been won over. It only means that one has ceased to constitute a threat.
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Euphemisms are unpleasant truths wearing diplomatic cologne.
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Because it is in the nature of things that they become extreme, we have passed down from manliness to cruelty. If I had been told when I was 20 that there was a tavern in the town where the brave and the cruel were gathered together,
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No effort is required to define or even attain happiness, but enormous concentration is needed to abandon everything else.
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Sex is the last refuge of the miserable.
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I never saw Portsmouth by day.
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You fall out of your mother’s womb, you crawl across open country under fire, and drop into your grave.
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He knew them only ‘in Braille’ – the curtains were never drawn back in the rooms in Oxford where he met those boys. It was the most sordid life you can imagine. And he was bleating about love and dragging the fair name of Mr. Plato into the trial – after a life like that?
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If you don’t stay in some days, you can’t recharge your batteries.
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In England, nobody’s your friend.
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Vice is its own reward.
QUENTIN CRISP