“Winning is only important in war and surgery.”

I’m an Einstein of the streets and an Oxford scholar of common sense.

I think everyone should go to college and get a degree and then spend six months as a bartender and six months as a cabdriver. Then they would really be educated.

Fifty percent of the doctors in this country graduated in the bottom half of their classes.

It’s so ridiculous to see a golfer with a one foot putt and everybody is saying “Shhh” and not moving a muscle.

Then we allow nineteen year-old kids to face a game-deciding free throw with seventeen thousand people yelling.

That’s it. Curtains. Off to the races. Treetops. Seashells and balloons.

Can’t win without talent, you know.

If a player leaves Marquette and doesn’t have some of my blood in him, then I don’t think I’ve done a good job.

Eliminate the referees, raise the basket four feet, double the size of the basketball, limit the height of the players to 5 feet 9 inches, bring back the centre jump, allow taxi drivers in for free and allow the players to carry guns.

Don’t call me son unless you’re going to include me in your will. (When Adolph Rupp called him, “Son.”)

The people who know basketball, their elevators don’t go to the top.

” Let me take two shots in the arm and a punch on the nose and let me get on to the next thing.

I let ballplayers yell back at me because I wasn’t trying to prove I’m boss. I know I’m boss.

The only difference between being eccentric and being nuts is the number of security boxes you own.

The world is run by C students

I called him over and told him about it. He told me that in the back there’s a tank they keep the lobsters in and while they’re in there, they fight and sometimes one loses a claw. I told him ‘then bring me a winner.’

Economics is not brain surgery.

Let the writer take up surgery or bricklaying if he is interested in technique. There is no mechanical way to get the writing done, no shortcut.

It is better not to apply any treatment in cases of occult cancer; for if treated (by surgery), the patients die quickly; but if not treated, they hold out for a long time.

I’m an actor – it’s not brain surgery. If I do my job right, people won’t ask for their money back.

I’ve had surgery on my knee and both feet and my elbow.

Surgery is just stabbing in a courteous environment

I obviously don’t feel under pressure to look young, because I have had no Botox or surgery. I don’t judge people who choose to have it, but I don’t want to erase who I am.

The only thing that I haven’t done is perform brain surgery on myself. I’ve been very, very lucky. I’ve spared Shakespeare undue stress by not doing that.