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Great humorists are great insulters.

Dick Cavett

I eat at this German-Chinese restaurant and the food is delicious. The only problem is that an hour later you’re hungry for power.
DICK CAVETT

Eat Food Hungry Myself Power
Lawyers work hard and, like us, they’re human, many of them.
DICK CAVETT

Hard Work Lawyer Ourselves
The emotions in all true anxiety dreams are next to unbearable.
DICK CAVETT

Anxiety Bear Dreams Emotion True
It’s a rare person who wants to hear what he doesn’t want to hear.
DICK CAVETT

Himself Person Rare
The mob became unruly and the police were forced to resort to sex.
DICK CAVETT

Force Police Sex
Can you picture yourself at the age 60 doing what you do now?
DICK CAVETT

Age Photograph Yourself
I’m not the guy with the enormous comedy nose or the big feet or the bad posture or the whatever; a physical comic has certain things.
DICK CAVETT

Body Comedy Comic Myself
The brain process that results in a joke materializing where no joke was before remains a mystery. I’m not aware of any scholarly, scientific or neurological studies on the subject.
DICK CAVETT

Brain Joke Mystery Process Result Study Subject
Show people tend to treat their finances like their dentistry. They assume the man handling it knows what he is doing.
DICK CAVETT

Assumption Finance Handle Himself People Treat
I did standup while still working for Johnny Carson in the mid-’60s, thus gaining the advantage of at least getting laughs from him about how I hadn’t the night before.
DICK CAVETT

Advantage Laughter Myself Night Stand Work
It’s not always easy to identify your own voice. It comes with time.
DICK CAVETT

Easy Identify Time Voice Yourself
I find most ‘sacred music’ pretty dismal.
DICK CAVETT

Finding Music Myself Sacred
By the time I was in the fourth grade, I sounded exactly like my father on the phone.
DICK CAVETT

Father Myself Phone Sound Time
If your parents never had children, chances are neither will you.
DICK CAVETT

Children Parents Yourself
If I were running a campaign, I’d urge taking the mountain of money reportedly squandered on pizza, coffee and bagels and spending it more wisely – on a talented young comedy writer.
DICK CAVETT

Campaign Comedy Myself Pizza Run Talent Wisdom Young
To label me an intellectual is a misunderstanding of what that is.
DICK CAVETT

Intellectual Label Myself Understand

Great humorists are great insulters.

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Great humorists are great insulters.

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